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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth and @Zoe7

I am sorry you girls have chest infections - nasty and exhausting - really hard to get over sometimes - it's difficult

And I am sorry and rather surprised you can't get any antibiotics for it Eth - that sounds strange unless your doctor is sure it's viral and not bacterial - and I hope you recover quickly enough so you can help your adult post-op child with the situation facing that one

It's such a huge responsibility doing something like that - I thought about it for a few moments there and wondered if going to a public hospital for some tablets would help but then - maybe things could be worse with other people coughing and sneezing

We've had a hard winter in Melbounre - not fun at all - we had some spring-like days and the sun is rising earlier and setting later but it has been cold lately

All the best for both of you and hope you both recover

Dec

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth as usual I'm struggling to come to terms with everything . It has all become like a dark cloud that follows me wherever i go.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Owlunar Just day by day with as much rest as I can get inbetween all the work I have to do. Taking it as eas as I can and hoping these ABs kick in soon to help with the recovery. Have you seen Owlunar again? Still smile at you seeing an owl so close and the joy it gave you

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Rest and antibiotics and good food is the best we can do with chest infections @Zoe7

And teaching school - wow - children tend to get very virulent colds - when mine were young I was always catching them and they can run quickly to asthma, bronchitis - even pleurisy - I wonder if winters are harsher in Hobart - Melbourne can get smoggy -

But winter is nearly over

As far as I know Owlunar never came back - I think she must have been lost - she did give me a lot of joy and I have been out to look for her on fine nights - the place where I know owls roost here is some distance away - I have been there in the evenings a long time ago and they could be heard whooing and hooting quietly as they settled their young and prepared to hunt - they tend to like big pine trees

They used to roost where my grandmother worked and she took me there one gloomy day and the groundsman took me into the old stables and covered me up with a clean hessian bag and told me the mice would come and play but not to worry - the owls would come in and take them away.

And I was still and alone and the owls flew in and took the mice - they fly silently - I was less than 5 years old with this vivid memory over seventy years ago. I was told they were barn owls and I think Owlunar is a barn owl too.

She's still about somewhere and she is one owl with a name - I like to think of her as my owl

Dec

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Awesome news about the driving lessons @eth ❣️

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Have a good day @Zoe7

Hi @Former-Member @Owlunar @Faith-and-Hope @eudemonism

@Owlunar you've reminded me of an incredible experience I had once with an owl. It was night time at the Darwin Festival and all the trees in the botanic gardens were lit up and had amazing large lamps hanging from them. Quite magical. As I walked along a path I looked up to see an owl sitting on a branch quite close to me. I stopped to take a photo of it. At the exact instant I clicked the button the owl swooped and did a circle around my head. Somehow in the photo there were 4 images of the owl - just a cheap digital camera on a basic setting. It really did seem like magic happened in that moment. Recently I had an owl visit me here too when I was in the garden at night. You're right about how quietly they fly, this one also came quite close to me.

There are different sayings about owls - one is that they represent wisdom and another is that they warn of a need for caution. It's interesting to google such things.

Hope you all have a nice peaceful day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi again @eth

Yes - I am having a peaceful day - the stressful week last week left it's mark and I am catching up after that

Owls are for wisdom and order - caution too I think - for wisdom comes from living a life aware of hazards

That was fantastic to get a photo like that with a cheap camera - you went meant to get it - and they are special moments to keep in one's heart and memory

I think they are rare because they hunt at night and they are silent - they have large, complex eyes as well - and their hearing is unique

I will be going to Cairns Aquarium soon - I will be able to see things most people do not and I am really looking forward to this - I enjoyed myself at Cairns so much last year that I wanted to stay longer but I was worrried about my old cat so I came home but I have been looking forward to another trip soon - and to get away to the warm air of the tropics will be excellent -

They have a lot of fruit bats in Cairns - they have big trees where they gather and it's possible to see them

Dec

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

mmmm Cairns @Owlunar ... good idea. I'm heading for cold old Canberra next week.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey everyone around this morning @Owlunar @eth @Faith-and-Hope @Zoe7

Loving the owl stories xxx

@Zoe7 I hope you're not feeling too bad at School today and the lab's work quickly.

@eth I hope you can get better quickly too, sending healing vibes xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Angels333

I'm glad you love the owl stories - I am a story-teller - all my grandparents I knew when I was a child were story-tellers and I seem to be the same - I was missing one grandfather and wish I knew his stories as well

I realise that you have been recently bereaved - this is a time to care for yourself and put yourself first - it's time to be gentle with yourself and get the best rest and good food you can and find time to nuture your heart because it has been hurt - grief work is hard work

It's not easy to work through it - it takes a lot of time - I will be thinking of you - I am so glad you came back to the forum when you did

Dec

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