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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That's tough my friend @saturnzoon

You are on my thoughts with all you are going through.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth thinking about you today with your child's surgery.

@MDT Congratulations on your interview! Sending hugs xxx

@Zoe7 How did your interview go?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 Sorry, how did your assembly go?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hope your doing ok @eth

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

thanks @Angels333 hope you have enjoyed your day my friend 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@MDT , today was lovely thanks, had lunch out, went for a walk in the park. A tolerable amount of bad thoughts..... so not intolerable, I think it's a win for today...

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Angels333 The assembly went really well. The kids were fantastic and I was very proud of them They were all so excited and wanted to practice several times - so a fair chunk of our time after recess was in preparation for their presentation. It certainly payed off though - I nearly forgot they were only 1/2s as they were so confident and articulate. They finally got to take their pompom animals home too so that was extra exciting for them.

Glad to be home and have it all over ...I knew it would be worth it to get it all done and that it certainly was. Got a lot to do this weekend again but if I can get prepared for the upcoming week early then it will be easier during the week.

How are you holding up Hon? Do you have work tomorrow?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Zoe7 Congratulations on your assembly! It really means a lot making special memories for your class. I do have work tomorrow, I am trying to keep positive and keep the anxiety away. I also had a really good day with lunch out with Mr Angels then a walk in the sunshine at a local park.

Rest up my friend, you've done a good job 💙💙

Love Angels333

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you @Angels333 I was actually excited about coming on here and letting you all know how well it went. It means so much to me that I have had the support and encouragement from you all this week. Earlier in the week I did not think we would get it all done and it would come together but the kids have been amazing (most of the time lol) and really helped each other (and me) out to get it all done.

You will be okay tomorrow Hon - fight that anxiety in the knowledge that you are not only good at your job but are held in high regard there as well. I have full confidence that you can get through it - take the positives of today and the memories of such a lovely day into tonight and tomorrow and feed off them - you got this Hon

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Managed to tell a friend yesterday that I was going to a counsellor. I never knew she understood where I was coming from, but she does. Sent me a beautiful poem she found on the net, called "Beyong the Mask". It was just so perfect, about how we hide ur tears, pain, fears, thoughts, memories etc behind a mask. Can't read it without tears coming....they could have written it from inside me! Still have to work on believing the last bit of it, which says "Take off the mask, begin to peel, How beautiful, when you are revealed". Having trouble with seeing that still, the mask is still too firmly stuck on. She said she knew I had been coming to this stage (I have no idea how when I only just got here myself). I guess that some people understand more than we think they do, and maybe the mask does not always keep as much hidden as we like to think. Have written that out in a book I have with song lyrics, sayings, a few poems, and a couple of things that got to me from interviews I have watched and things people have said to me. I remember too much of what I want to forget, but forget the helpful things at times when I need them so carry my notebook with me now. I even let the same friend look at some of the things I have in it. The only person EVER I have let see it! She is a great friend, but I feel so much closer to her now knowing she understands what I never said

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