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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Appleblossom

How are you going today

Eude

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Shaz51

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Bunniekins

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins Hope you have a lovely day too. There is a craft UFO day here today at the RSL so I am planning to try and make it. Even if just for the company

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Bunniekins @eudemonism @cutiepiekitty @Adge @Appleblossom @BlueBells @saturnzoon @Zoe7 and anyone else around here today. Hope you've had a nice start to the day and enjoy whatever you're up to today. I'll be over on the Saturday Soiree thread if anyone wants to catch up or chat. Take care.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Adge hey, good morning, have a nice day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hope you have a good day @eth

Hi @Meowmy Hugs to both of you

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 hey good morning, hope you have a nice day. Thanks for kind message.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @saturnzoon good on you for not picking up after them. Sorry to hear your older son is hurting your younger one. that's terrible. Is there any reason that might be causing the older son's rotten behaviour? I'm guessing he's the same one abusing you financially. How old is he? Could he live independently? If so it really does seem to me like it's time for him to either pull his head in or move out. I understand how powerless it can feel, and also having DV in the past how hard it is to stand up to anyone. I did a course called Living Beyond Abuse at the local womens centre and it really helped a lot in understanding the cycles of behaviour and establishing boundaries and recognizing 'red flags'. There are probably such courses available on-line now.

Do take care xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth @Mazarita

@cutiepiekitty @Bunniekins

@Adge @Sophia1

@Appleblossom @Ali11

@Meowmy @saturnzoon

@Former-Member

I think I'm way to caught up in the negatives factors about my life and my circumstances. And it drains me of vital energy i need to get on with the positive stuff. And from what i can tell, everyone else seems to have contributed to it, and feeds from it-in a sadistic and controlling way. It annoys me so much ...

Always questioning my sanity and feeling robbed of my peace. Never truly quite content or at ease . Always lacking something. Always trying to get it right and make it better. It's annoying i tell ya .

Eude

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