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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm still here almost every day, @eth, but don't spend quite the slabs of time I used to do in the past. I think this is a good thing. It's why I stepped back from being a community guide, to have no expectations placed upon me here. That way everything is about goodwill, it's natural, not from a sense of what we 'should' be doing in the way of support as peers. That can become very draining I think. I so value our connection too. I'm glad you feel it is a two way street, I feel the same. It's about friendship for me, more than our shared struggles, though that's part of it.

Sounds like you'll be heading back to bed now and so should I. Thanks for another chat, friend.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thankyou too @Mazarita nite nite and sleep well

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morning Mazy @Mazarita 🙂

Forum Lands a bit tense. I hope it settles soon. I worry I've offended people, and I feel offened by a couple of people; but I realise everyone offends everyone sometimes. This is a public place and I don't do public places very well.

It gladdened my heart to hear you caught up with someone you've known for so long. But what really felt good was hearing about your energy at all levels 😄 I hope it's still with you today

I'm quietly excited {although Forumland has brought me down a touch} about a possible HUGE camp trip I'm planning. I've even sent official messages back and forth. I think, if everything goes Ok, I'm going to book a place for Janurary next year! I'm thinking if I book and pay {it's quite an amount in my books} it'll make me go!

Lots of love to you Mazy

Niqua

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, Niqua

I know what you mean about things feeling a bit tense, though I only visit a few threads these days really. Tension has come and gone at different times on the forum over the years. It's usually fairly temporary. I hope that's the case this time too. It can be wise to back away until things clear a bit, if it's troubling. Alternatively, I sometimes avoid threads, just to care for my own mental and emotional wellbeing. I haven't seen anything to suggest you might have offended anyone.

Energy is not as bad as yesterday, though I've had far less sleep. Didn't get there last night until about 4am. But I don't have the energy to leave the flat yet, haven't had breakfast and still in nightie. If it's not raining I might make it out for a beach walk later. If so, I could text to see if the friend I cancelled yesterday is free today to join me.

I am excited about your possible (probable? 🙂 ) new trip. You described some of it the other night. Sounds great!

Love and hugs to you, Niqua.

@Former-Member

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi and good morning @Mazarita How are you doing today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, not sure if I've caught you while online. I'm okay this morning, only rose from bed a little while ago. Off to see psychiatrist soon. How are you today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yep you've caught me @Mazarita Hope the psychiatrist goes well for you.

I finally cleaned my floors and my glass front door and did my washing. Actually worked up a sweat on domestics! I've been out with bro and sil and her friend to a pop-up bakery which was good. No plans for this afternoon, maybe a wee nap

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry, @eth, got stuck in the loo between posts.

Sounds great what you have been up to, sweat and all. Hope you enjoy your nap and afternoon.

I have to take off again now to go to the psychiatrist.

Good to bump into you, even if only very briefly this morning.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @eth, happen to be up and wondered if you might be too. Hopefully you are instead sleeping. ox

Good morning, everyone. Wishing a good day to all.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Mazarita. You're up early. I hope your appointment went well and was worthwhile. I have noticed that you have been really supportive of forum folk recently. It's kind of rubs off on me even though I'm not involved in the conversations directly. Thanks for being positive! It's not easy (for me, anyway).

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