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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank u for ur encouragement my friend @Bunniekins . As much as I am not looking forward to it, I am glad that il b going private. Basically anytime from Monday it can hapn. Pretty scared about it, about what I'm going to hav to go thru, but also resigned to the fact that I don't hav a choice. I just hope they can get me better, at least to a place that i can have a relatively normal life, b able to go back to work and b more the person that I am instd of the shell that I am now.

Thanks for ur support greenpea, and for thinking of me. Xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hap-pea Thursday and good morning to @Exoplanet @Doglover @Mazarita @Appleblossom @Angels333 @Former-Member @eth @Shaz51 wishing you all a safe and kind day ahead. Lots of love greenpeaxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi and good morning @Appleblossom @Doglover @Angels333 @Bunniekins @Former-Member @Meowmy @Shaz51 and anyone here who I've missed.

Hope today is going nicely so far.

Thanks for the supportive comments to those who gave them (you know who you are!).

The support flowing between people on this thread is lovely to be part of.

Didn't end up doing the transport training yesterday as it was raining on and off. Instead went to a major department store that had sent me a $10 voucher and bought a really good quality piece of underclothing - actually tried them on and got advice re fitting this time. After having bought 2 that don't fit properly over the last couple of years because I didn't want to undress to try them on. But had a hard time with the huge mirror. It's a long time since I saw myself full length and it was pretty confronting. Plus having the fitting done - being seen by someone else, was very hard for me. My body is just so different from what it was most of my life, with all the weight gain from pmeds. Nuff said probably! the outcome was good, but the process was difficult, to say the least.

Then my support worker and I had a yummy Greek lunch and went to the beach briefly before coming home.

My family is away again from yesterday morning through to Sunday evening, so it's just me and the dog for a few days. Today is a quiet day at home, a no-plans day so I get a chance to respond to people here more properly.

Hopefully catch some of you for a real time chat.

Thinking of you @Doglover and hoping your day today passes gently as you wait til Monday. Getting closer now.

Take care all xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Hey eth 😄 yes the full length mirrors are confronting .... oh well I am getting to the point of embracing my body shape these days as it is either being plump and sane or thin and mad. Thin and mad is not a good look for the pea. Also being plump helps to smooth out the lines :). I generally buy my clothes online so I dont have to cope with the department store attendants, noise, lights etc who drive me crazy and I know what clothes suit me these days and what doesnt.

How is is sil's brother doing?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you @Bunniekins 😊

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Appleblossom xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Bunniekins I haven't mentioned sil's brother for a while - not that I don't worry about his presence at times, but thank goodness I haven't laid eyes on him for several weeks, even tho' he's still next door. I've heard he's staying off the grog so far, working night shifts and sleeping most of the day. Pulled his head right in regarding me after a good talking to by bro and sil. I don't know how he managed to keep his job as an acute care nurse what with the hospital detoxes and rehab he did. Mind blowing that he was still doing it when he was constantly in the high range of alcohol toxicity. Anyway, not my problem. Do my best not to think about him.

But it does come up a bit when I'm home alone for a few days, as I am again at the moment. Makes me a bit vigilant.

How's life going for you atm?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @eth i can relate with the weight situation. I wear nothing but elasticised bottoms now ( popped all the buttons and zips on my jeans lol) 😊

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Former-Member I've found really cheap jeans at BigW and Target but also mostly wear stretch pants. The piece I bought yesterday was for the upper body.

How's your day looking?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins @Mazarita @eth @Doglover @Appleblossom @Angels333 @Former-Member

@Meowmy @Shaz51 @Exoplanet and all who visit.

@Doglover I hope it's al good news for you Monday, try not to think on it to much which is easier said than done but hopefully you can keep your mind busy. They do say going privately is so much better and different, they can monitor you a lot better. I use to have private cover but it kept going up, I could only keep the extras now.

Eth I haven't been clothes shopping for years and hate looking in the mirror as well, I've actually been wearing my sons clothes when they don't want them anymore, my boys are taller than me and they only buy and wear the brand clothing so cost a lot of money cause then there clothes are a nice fit for me as there a bit bigger and like bigger ones hides all the flab.

Greenpea I also buy clothes on line to as I Cant go to shops, its easier.

I hope everyone has a good day, it's cold where I am so I'm staying in bed, catching up on everyone here if I can watching shows and crocheting.

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