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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

So much respect for your fight for social justice @Appleblossom, and the need to look after you as well as you can while you do so. Take care Apple

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Appleblossom, I read your post on the other thread. It's okay to have a rant. I hope you are okay after releasing that and will reach out for more real world support if needed. I know things must be so extremely stressful at present. Nothing more to say really, just to acknowledge that, and send kind and supportive words, as best I can find them for now. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Greetings Niqua, sending you a return letter in this early evening. I was at a friend's place earlier and couldn't reply to you then, as I am slow as a snail on the mobile keyboard.

I'm not glad to hear about the pains in your chest, but smiled at your gallows humour. You know I would be at the doctor about that. I won't write the next sentence cos you won't want another nag. But there's more than just me who don't want to lose you.

I also find refreshing and hear truth in what you say about being born both living and dying.

That sounds like a terrible two years and I fervently hope you never return there. Some selfishness is fair enough. I know I am selfish. I think we all are in various ways and various degrees. I'm not sure it's helpful to tally it? It's also worth remembering that, with physical and mental illness, we are often struggling to even look after ourselves. I think illness does have a general tendency to withdraw us into ourselves.

Yes to your ideas about functioning in a different way. And yet... there's some part of me that longs to be that 'good girl' who ticks boxes. Lol, absurd. And yet again, I generally prefer to communicate with 'differently functioning' people too. It is a bugger though that we 'different functioners' are marginalised to such an extent (though I think I've kind of done that myself in my life as well).

Thanks for news of your cat. He sounds very special, amazing in fact. So glad you saved him.

Your new trip for the new year sound truly awesome!!!

Hugs for your tough ride with those times out of reach of full consciousness.

The baiting is a truly horrible thing they do out there. I would feel the same as you about it.

I made it to art group today, showered before I went. Stopped in and had a browse at the local op shop on the way. Did some drawing and colouring in the group, which is growing week by week so that we are filling the room. A friend also turned up, which was a nice surprise. So we will be getting together tomorrow to go for a beach walk too, then to another workshop at the community centre. After art today, I visited my other friend (of the-glitch-that-made-me-sad-the-other-night). I managed to give her some space over recent days since the glitch, and this time she rang me to invite me over. We were sweet as with each other today and spent a number of hours together, all better.

Lots of love to you too. @Former-Member

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Cant read atm

but

Thank you for expressing some understanding for ME, my friends.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'll be thinking of you @Appleblossom

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, just noticed you online. I'm around for a little bit if you'd like a chat. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita how's your day been?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Actually, @eth, it's been a wipe out. One of those days where I woke and just couldn't wake all day. Only got out of bed properly in the afternoon, falling asleep again in chair, etc. Pity, after such a good day yesterday. But them's the breaks with me it seems. How's your day today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita hopefully the extra rest will see you having a better day tomorrow. I had a s**t night what with bronchitis or reflux taking it in turns to wake me unpleasantly, so I stayed in bed til 9am, late for me. Spent the morning catching up on emails etc from the day before, then went for another fairly heavy session with the psychologist. She is really good, compassionate and a great listener and feedback provider. She said she likes the expression 'feel it to heal it' and it rings true for me. Today was mostly about traumas in childhood up to age 10. Just been switching off with telly for a couple of ours since then. Will take it really easy tomorrow too.

Yesterday was a 4 hour workshop on Easy Steps to a Healthier You which was good, fun at times, mostly a reminder of a lot that I know but don't apply often enough. In between presentations we played with hoola hoops, did some belly dance moves and other easy-to-do-at-home exercises, and did a few short meditation/mindfulness exercises. Over-all great value for $10 including lunch at the local women's centre. And the night before we made it to the dancing in the dark session - wasn't really in the dark so no collisions! Just free dancing with people of all ages and genders. I lasted 40 min without a break which was pleasantly surprising. Disappointed that the extra exercise doesn't have me sleeping better.

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