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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom Hey Appleblossom and thank you re your kind words on my stupid, annoyintg cold. What can one do but soldier on :). Re animals and people I have always prefered animals to people and it doesnt surprise me at all that kangaroos have good manners 🙂

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Adge Hi Adge and thank you for kind words re the sickness. Have to go but wanted to touch base as it has been ages since we last spoke. How are you my dear finchy friend? I hope you are well. Are you going out anywhere special this weekend? with anyone special?:). I hope so. If not there is always lots of other weekends. Take good care of yourself. Love peaxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

All the best to you too @Bunniekins

No, no dates this weekend.

The last person deactivated her dating profile (on dating site), just before we were going to finally arrange to meet.

She had cancelled our date, the weekend before.

So that knocked the stuffing out of me (for now).

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Doglover I'm very sorry to hear things are quite so difficult for you at the moment. Good to see you were able to see your pdoc again and hopefully will get some relief regards more sleep. Sleeping a lot less is one of my warning signs too. It's good to have a prn med on hand to try to break the cycle when it's escalating. I really hope it works for you. Getting even a little more sleep at those times can make so much difference. I know you really want to wait til your insurance kicks in for private admission and am reassured that your therapy team is supporting you in the meanwhile. I know from experience how much better it is to go voluntarily than otherwise, even if it means a short public stay before transferring to a private place. Thinking of you and hoping things improve with more sleep.

@Appleblossom your presence here has made a huge difference for me too over the last few years. xx

Take care to all here tonight, thinking of you all. @Zoe7 @Bunniekins @Adge @Meowmy @Shaz51 xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Goodnight @eth

Adge

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yep I agree, I would love to see the giraffe @Zoe7 .

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins @Angels333 I am not sure whether I will be able to show you the giraffe when he is finished as he will be goign to school. It may be an image that I can put up temporarily for you both but not leave it permanently. It will be another couple of weeks before he is done as I'll leave him to completely dry until next weekend and then begin painting him the following week.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank u so much @Zoe7 for ur support, i so appreciate it. I wish i cld giv u a hug. I need to take hope and inspiration from you and ur journey, and the fact that u r now back at work and able to function in society after such a dark time. I am just struggling so much to see any hope at present. But if u hav come from the depths of darkness surely i can too. But i am such a mess at the moment. My symptoms just keep getting worse and i just dont think they know what to do with me. I just hope thr is a way thru this whr i am no longer being tortured every day by these horrible symptoms and whr i can bcome a functioning member of society again. I want that so bad and im so scared its never going to hapn. Im just so scared Zoe. Xxx

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

What hav u bn doing with the giraffe @Zoe7 . Sorry havnt read thru the thread, only when im tagged.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Doglover I personally think that the want to and determination to get out of that darkness is the first step. That can feel so distant when you are living in that darkness day to day but you have a desire to be in a better place and that is positive. It is by no means easy Hon but you have so many of us here supporting you, encouraging you and helping with whatever we can. A belief in a better future is half the battle - the rest will come with ongoing support and your very real willingness to do the hard work to get there - and it is hard work ...there is no denying that. I have belief for you and will continue to have that as I can see the light within you - now it is for you to find that light yourself

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