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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks for the response @Appleblossom my mood is a bit low this evening but I am just grateful that I had a good day today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning everyone. Hope everyone is doing OK.

I'm having some strange symptoms that I think might be side effects of my medication. I'm feeling very distant from my emotions, like I have little felt sense of them. I know when I am happy or worried or sad etc but I don't actually feel it inside my body. I'm also having some trouble with my words getting stuck or jumbled at times, somewhere between my head and my mouth. I can write OK (though it takes me a long time) but speaking can be different. It clicked only recently that my mood stabiliser might be behind some of it.

On Monday I went to the Dr to ask about decreasing it. My GP didn't exactly laugh at me (she wouldn't as she is fabulous) but I definitely didn't walk out with any changes to my medication. She was pretty clear about how she thinks I can become very unwell without medication which had me questioning how much of my recently OK-ish is because of a medication and how much is because of things I have been doing myself. I want to think there's a lot more to it than meds, but maybe I have been under estimating the value of them for me. I was kind of disappointed when I thought about it for a while. She was really happy to hear I am having a break from big feelings and said that was exactly what the medication should do, even if it feels weird to me, and hugely encouraging of me continuing to get that space from them for a while longer.

I'm going to see my psych today and will talk it through with him too, though I have a sneaking suspicion he will also be on team meds 😏

Just wanted to get that out of my head I think, as it's been kind of a challenge to sit with this week. I'm thinking plenty of people here know what it is like to be pondering and managing the pros and cons of meds.

I finished and then decorated my cake @eth. I'm happy that it turned out. I have a feeling it's way too sickly but I think it looks cool. It has round wafer biscuits all around it, malteasers on the top, and a big ribbon to wrap it together. Lots of sparklers will finish it off 🙂

Hope today has some good in it for everyone 👋❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

The cake sounds awesome! @CheerBear

I hope your symptoms ease off a little. And I hope your psychiatrist appt goes well.

Side effects from meds are just awful sometimes. Mine is weariness, I cry at ads on the tv, masterchef anything!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Teariness

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @CheerBear I hear you about feeling out of touch with emotions. I've had long periods of this in the past. Please don't underestimate how much you achieve with the things you do yourself. You rise every day and care for others (your family and others) almost all your waking hours, both in life and here. You manage to find time for self-care in the midst of all that. You are busy out in the world a lot yet still make time for things like your baking yesterday and creating joyful times for your kids. To me you are amazing and inspiring.

Be patient with yourself. Having a break from 'big feelings' could possibly be a blessing in disguise, but I relate to it feeling strange compared to what you are used to.

I understand how it can sometimes be difficult to work out where the benefit of some meds outweighs the not-so-good side effects. And hard to tell if something is caused by them or would be happening anyway. It's awful how we 2nd guess our own efforts sometimes. I am on mood stabilizers and other MH meds too and sometimes struggle to accept that what they prevent (high and low extremes) has to outweigh what they cause.

I keep starting to write something and editing myself here. So perhaps I should leave it here. Just know I am thinking of you and I think I get how you're feeling. I hope your psych hears you on this today and has some advice to offer, or a tweak of the meds or both.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you @Angels333. I'm sorry to hear you have side effects also. It's so tricky sometimes! How are you feeling today?

@eth for all I said ^ above having not much felt sense of feelings, your post made me tear up a bit in a nice way. Thank you heaps for being so kind and so encouraging. It really helped give me a bit of a boost this morning. Mood stabilisers are pretty new to me (6ish straight months of a dose within therapeutic range) and it seems I'm having more success with it than any other kind of psych med I've had in the past.

I hope whatever is going on for you that you have started to write but second guessed yourself about putting out here (I'm guessing that's what's going on?) is OK enough for you. Listening if you can and do share ❤

I'm about to play with a little glass terrarium thingy I bought for one of the kids teachers. It's mini and has a little fern thingy, tiny pebbles, soil, rocks etc. I accidentally tipped it over on the drive home and mixed it all up 😑 Not happy with myself but I'm thinking it might be a nice soothing thing maybe (if I don't get so frustrated with it I want to throw it which is probably more likely than not!) 🤞

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @CheerBear how did your terrarium turn out?

I'm fine, having a quiet day at home today. Did some crochet of a scarf I started 2 winters ago!

This morning I was just having trouble working out how much of my own experience to share. I just wanted to support you and give you hope.

I wrote a rave about 'anhedonia' and then deleted it, but it might interest you at this time. 'Blunted affect' is another way of describing it. I googled both and they describe how it can be for me for periods at a time. Sometimes it helps us if we can find language to describe what we're experiencing so we can then seek help. How did you go with your pdoc today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Shaz51 thinking of you and wondering how your NDIS phone call went today? Hope it was good for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear @Angels333 @Shaz51 @Bunniekins

@eth I read about "Blunted Affect" when I was about 20 doing research into my parents diagnoses. Where others were reading about and talking about falling in love or attraction or other emotions I was more scientific and had very few words that made sense to talk with other woman my age. Also when women were dismissive of men I was always defensive of men, so I had a positive attachment to father even though he was often not present and died young.To open up my heart always got too complicated and was better shelved, though eventually I did find my emotionality ... loads of it.

Still appreciating the female connections made here on the forum. Better late than never.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Appleblossom I really appreciate connection with you too! How are you?

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