FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

19,601 - 19,610 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Snuggles on the couch sound perfect for a cold night @Zoe7 and glad you had a good day at work

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It is so lovely having my little fluffball to snuggle up with and keep warm on these cold nights @Ali11 The Topic Tuesday has been a great discussion also - kept my mind off other things a bit too

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

thank you, i forgot about mentioning where we live.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

A big Hi and good morning to @saturnzoon @Mazarita

@Zoe7 (really hoping everything you are hoping for re work comes true xxxx)

@Ali11 @Former-Member

@eth (where were you yesterday?!!)

@CheerBear @Appleblossom

@Sophie1 (miss you terribly and never forget you xxxx)

@BryanaCamp (hoping you are doing okishxxx)

@Adge @Exoplanet

@Angels333 (hoping hospital is treating you wellxxx)

So many messages to all the beautiful people 🙂 and all the beautiful people who pass by today too. Big gardening day today with 81 year old neighbour :D. The triffid has grown back so we will be busy in the morning giving it a much needed haircut :). We will of course be going for a walk this morning and day two of no protein bars .... *sigh*. Have a great day everyone and looking forward to your posts throughout the day. Lots of love as always the peaxxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Bunniekins You are probably off on your early morning walk but dropping by on the off chance that you are about. This little flutterby is up at sill o'clock again - bad night so finding it better for now to be up than trying to sleep again just yet. Hope you enjoy your walk little pea

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins I think you may have me mixed up with a different Sophie user name ? A few posts seem maybe this might be the case as I’m still around and posting and seems your tags for me @Sophie1 may actually be meant for another Sophie ... just super gently suggesting this may be the case and worried someone else is missing their tags ... anyway hi and good morning anyways 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Sophie1 Hi Sophie1 and yes you are right I meant @Sophia1 .... I need my glasses checked lol .... nice to meet you anyway 🙂 and thank you for getting back to me as I really want to reconnect with Socphia1 as I miss her terribly 😞

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth you are one of the most unselfish people that I know eth. It is not being selfish not wanting boofhead back it is survival and I wouldn't want him back either. In truth I am sure his mother and sil don't really want him back. What hair cut will you get?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I understand your apprehension about your sil's brother coming back to the property @eth so many of those previous experiences for you would be coming up with his drinking as well as the uncertainty of what he will do next if he is still drinking so much.

I also understand your frustration about water tai chi - being cancelled and no contact regarding that is not great, I know you like going too so that makes it frustrating for you too.

Hope your psych appointment goes well and you feel refreshed witha haircut

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Bunniekins and @Zoe7 Lovely to see you irt. Sorry if I've missed you, I was doing a long reply elsewhere. And being reminded again of how much helping someone else helps us too.

Hope you're enjoying your days so far.

I'm growing my hair so it will just be a bit of a trim in a way that lets it show its curls. But also a wash (mmmm head massage mmmm!!!) and blow-dry. I only get it done about once a year because I want to be an old lady with long grey hair one day! Figured my birthday is a good reason to do it now. Yep another year has passed!

19,601 - 19,610 of 27,230