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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @eth 🙂 I had the same notifications issues this morning, including receiving some emails notifying me of support on my posts. When notifications have gone down like this in the past, I've found it can take a few hours for it to all 'reset' and in that time I get some funky emails haha! 🤞 It is all OK now.

That's exciting about your volunteer gig too. Are you able to say anymore? Fingers crossed for you 🙂

Sometimes I read about your week and feel tired thinking about all you do lol! You have lots on that sounds great though and you can really see how much you're getting from it all. Go you!

Hope bridge is fun today ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @CheerBear ! Feels like we haven't had a chat in real time for ages. No I can't say more yet, but if it comes together I will. When I first started being this busy it took my breath away and took some adjusting to - but then I adjusted my attitude! Told myself that I'm not only doing essentials any more, more than half my time out is for enjoyable activities that I've chosen to do. But it has been a huge expansion in my life over the last few months. But remember, I don't have several others to care for like you do - You amaze me too. Especially taking on a job on top of all that. Go CheerBear!!!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It has been a while since we've caught up in real time @eth. I miss the early morning chats here sometimes. Nice to catch people when I do though.

I hope whatever it is you're hoping to do brings something good to your life 🙂

Love that you've been able to adjust your attitude. I'm working on that as I find myself frustrated and overwhelmed sometimes trying to do more, which then leads me to feeling angry that life is the way it is. I used to be able to do so much more and that still hurts at times. Acknowledging the steps I am taking and sharing them with understanding, encouraging people (like you all) helps some attitude adjusting for me. I'll get there. Thanks for the smiles and the good feels you give me. I appreciate it (you) ❤

I have one off to camp this morning, one cranky that they had to make their own breakfast (cereal - not exactly a big ask 😏) and one who likes to sleep in, still asleep. I better go and get them all moving.

Hope your morning goes well 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Gee thanks! Enjoy your day off @CheerBear xx

I remember the excitement of going off to camp ... hope they have a great time.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi All,

I'm off to see my psychologist and I've done none of the things we agreed on! I am worried that he won't want to see me anymore, that I will fall in the too hard basket..... apart from that it's a beautiful day outside and I hope everyone is okay xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hi @Angels333 don't worry, it's your psychologist's job to stick with you thru the trials, I hope the appointment goes well & you feel suported.

hi @eth sounds like you have a busy week ahead, great! Well done on doing such a great job of house/dog/garden sitting, that's a lot of work & you're almost there. I love the sound of your veggie seeds, I'm just growing herbs atm as my veggies never seem to turn out well, I'm confined to pots so I'll blame that!

hi @CheerBear hope you have a nice, chilled rest day today. Yeah, I've been volunteering for about 12 months and a small part of that is relevant to my job searching. The staff are super positive and supportive, they make it really worthwhile. I've found it impossible to get a volunteer gig in an acutal library so will just have to keep trying with the job searching.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Certainly a very busy week coming up for you @eth but I hope you enjoy all the good in your week

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Zoe7 how are you today? Should pop over to your thread in a minute.

Hi also @BryanaCamp and @Angels333 nice to see you both. How did you go with the pdoc today Angels333?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I am okay @eth Struggling with some big things but will get there in time. Haven't posted elsewhere about it - and don't think I will - just need to get through it as best I can.

It was great to read about your upcoming week and that keeping busy is actually a motivating factor for you - super impressed with how much you are getting out and doing Hon

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

You always impress me too @Zoe7 . Sending strength and perseverance and the hope for a positive outcome with whatever it is you're working through. If you do want to talk sometime just tag me.

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