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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Zoe7 @Bunniekins @Adge

@Zoe7 sorry to hear you have an uncertain future at this school beyond next term I hadn't realised that's how it is. Having grown up with teachers for parents I know how poorly the education dep't treats its teachers at times.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @outlander don't forget to take care of you too xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It is not ideal @eth but there is nothing I can do about it either. I am certainly hoping I can stay but it is completely out of my hands. It would have been nice to have that certainty and following through with my current role for the year would be nice - but I have to wait and see what the department does.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Zoe7 @eth 👋💕

In the coffee shop before church this morning .....

Just want to say “take courage” to both of you ..... you are full of courage, I know, but it’s a gentle flag-wave in your corner.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I guess it's another one of those one day at a time situations @Zoe7 and all you can do is give it your best shot. It's been so much better than your previous school so far, I really hope the dep't does the right thing for you. At least I am sure they will be getting positive reports about your performance.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello @eth @Faith-and-Hope @Bunniekins @Zoe7 @Adge hope you have a pleasant Sunday ahead. here's a grass tree for you to ponder and the walking track, a nice hike yesterday.

I'm a bit nervous this morning as I'm meeting a friend for lunch. It was supposed to be 3 of us but one friend has pulled out due to MI so it's just the two of us now - I don't want him to think it's a date or get the wrong idea as I have no romantic interest in him. I just value him as a friend.

Glad things are relatively stable and peacful so far at the house @eth , glas the sw went well & you had a nice scenic drive.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Faith-and-Hope Can always rely on you to provide a pick-me-up and kind words Enjoy your coffee and then church.

@eth The assistant principal has already said they want me to stay for the year and are hoping that can be the case. There is no question if it was up to the school then I would be there all year. I can always request a move back to this school at the end of the year if there is a position available but it all really is in the hands of the department.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks and back atcha @Faith-and-Hope

@Zoe7 I'm glad the school has told you they want you to stay. Such positive reinforcement of your efforts.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Glad you went on your hike @BryanaCamp and although you are having some doubts about your lunch meeting - just go with the flow and enjoy the company. If anything feels uncomfortable you can always excuse yourself and leave.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

There have been nothing but positives from that school @eth and I am so grateful I was placed there

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