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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

You are enough @Appleblossom and although you may not feel like that right now it doesn't make it any less true Hon - we here can see how hard it is in your current situation - and you have so much to deal with. It is quite natural to be feeling the way you do with so much negativity around you - and that is the nice way of me saying it. The emotional distress is not something you should be living with but it is the situation you are in and you are doing everything you can to deal with it. It is so hard when you do not know where that abuse is going to come from and if what you are doing (however quietly) will trigger that kind of response from your son. It is taking away the things that you love and give you joy as well - but he just does not get it. Such a hard situation for you to be in - but keep reaching out here and know you are loved, cared for and respected in this space Hon

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Do you do yoga @Zoe7 Or is it not your thing (not of interest)?

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

No not my thing @Adge My sister has mentioned to me that I could go with her but it really isn't something I have seriously considered doing. I do need to get into some form of fitness now that I can't go to the pool but lack of motivation is a factor.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom I echo what @Zoe7 said, couldn't have said it better. Living with someone who is volatile and unpredictable is awful, I've been there too. Especially when it's your child. I really feel for you and wish I had more words for you, but as you know I'm juggling a difficult time here too. Sending lots of love and care xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @saturnzoon sorry to hear what a hassle you're having and how uncooperative your GP is. When I applied (it took me 18 months from then to acceptance by NDIS) I found that they give a lot more weight to reports from psychologists, psychiatrists and occupational therapists than GPs when the disability is 'psychosocial' i.e. mental health. The journey I had with it, as well as input from lots of others, can be found on https://saneforums.org/t5/Our-stories/Anyone-started-with-the-NDIS/m-p/668299#M79832.

If you want to ask me anything about NDIS stuff you can do it there. And if I don't have the answers I'll do my best to find out.

Panic attacks suck (I get them too) and it's so unfair that trying to get help from NDIS can cause us such distress and make our MH worse. Here to support you with that if you want.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I think lack of motivation is a factor for most people @Zoe7 Especially me.

I was very surprised, that I kept up my 2 yoga classes per week - now for 7 & 1/2 years.

My religious friends at that time (now gone) - said that yoga was "eastern mystical Bad stuff", anti-Christian.

They thought that I would "lose my soul" by going to yoga, so they tried to scare me away from it.

That certainly did not help my motivation for doing yoga.

Gladly, those ex-friends were wrong.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

My meeting with my Coordinator of Supports was cancelled today too. I really wanted to talk to her before the others leave. She said she'd email me the information she has for me but it's nearly 6 pm and she hasn't.

Wondering what else can go pear-shaped at what is already a very challenging time.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It does feel like things are going pear-shaped a bit at the moment @eth but the support is there for you Hon- maybe she got caught up with other things and she will email it tomorrow. I know it feels like you are left in the lurch when things like this happen but there is often a reason - hold out until tomorrow morning and then ring her Hon if you haven't heard anything.

@Adge Glad you kept up your yoga classes - you certainly have been doing it a long time and seem to love it - and that is what matters

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Too many people around @Zoe7 people talk loudly outside rm at night , guy at work never stops talking all just self promoting or negative and all borderline delusion/lies anyway few days left

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Just concentrate on what you have to do at work and try to block out any negativity @TAB - get through these few days the best you can - it will be over soon.

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