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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @eth 🙂

I'm OK enough thanks. It's the first day of school holidays today and a very, very slow start to our day today. We all slept in after a tricky day and evening yesterday - my middle kid fractured their arm again 🙁 Sleep catch up for everyone was needed!

Great to read how you've been getting on. Sorry to hear your SW called in sick but nice to hear you're happy with a free day today. It's tricky to have the idea of a new worker out of the blue. It happened to me last week when my SW called in sick also.

Hope today is one with good in it for you ❤

Morning @Zoe7 and 👋 to everyone who passes by also.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @CheerBear So good to hear you all got a little more sleep last night. You have certainly had a frantic couple of days. Hope middle is not in too much pain today and you can all enjoy the beginning of the holidays.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh no @CheerBear sorry to hear about middle's fracture. Nice that you are able to have a really slow day today. I think you've had a pretty hectic week. How's your thinking about NDIS now, or shouldn't I ask?

@Zoe7 bum is healing well, at the peeling stage now. Hoping that will be gone by the time I want to go public in my swimmers on Tuesday!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

You must be missing water tai chi after a couple of weeks out of the water @eth I do hope you can go back this week Hon. I cancelled my pool membership this week - it has been over 3 months since I have been able to go and it was just wasted money. I can't get there with work as they have learn to swim classes in the afternoon that take up most of the warmer pool - so couldn't do my exercises anyway.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 maybe you could do similar exercises on land to what you do in the water. I've been doing that a little with the tai chi. However I tend to think teachers remain reasonably fit as you are on your feet all day most days.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I am extremely unfit from the couple of years of not doing anything @eth and really feel it going up and down the stairs each day. I also need to get back on the exercise bike - little motivation for that at the moment but need to push myself to do it - especially not being at the pool anymore. I started doing my exercises at home some time back but they have fallen by the wayside with work also.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Zoe7 🙂

It's been a trying week in a few ways but I got through it (so far at least 😉).

@eth the NDIS is going in a way that makes me think lots of words beginning with F and is a huge mess of "too much for me" - so it's going that well lol. I suggested to my support coordinator that it's a great idea for us to not speak with each other at all until my plan review and that's working much better for us than trying to communicate in any way. I'm going to cancel my weekly appointment with my 'social educator' this week as it feels only like entertaining someone for a few hours, which I really don't need. I should find another organisation to provide support but I've been squashed so much that I don't have it in me to try anymore. I'm tired of fighting. And aside from my psych sessions (which I still haven't used a cent of NDIS finding for), the whole thing has been nothing but a demoralising exercise in trying to navigate a system that can be... yeah.

(I really didn't mean for that to be the vent it was!)

In saying all of that, I get so much out of hearing how well it's working for you generally and that does give me some hope and probably keeps me holding on to a teeny tiny bit of fight that I'll pull out if and when I need again.

I think I need a time out after that! I'm going to have a shower and tidy up a bit then head out for puppy cuddles 😁 I'll say hi to her from you and Toby Zoe.

👋❤

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth I hope you have a good day, & weekend.

I'm slowly healing up - largely due to my vigilant efforts with the iodine wipes (changing twice daily).

Still very little energy yet, which is frustrating.

I would so love to have a holiday - especially since I've used 3 year's worth of Annual Leave on surgeries (& recovery), without any holiday.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It sounds so frustrating for you @CheerBear - it seems the system is designed on the premise that people do not have their own mind or any social skills at all CB. It is good for those with social anxiety and help in that area is fantastic but you really do not seem to be getting much out of the syste to align with your needs at all - very frustrating!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Adge hopefully once you've recovered this time you'll not need surgeries any more and will be able to work towards a proper holiday. Or even that you are entitled to some long service leave at some stage.

@CheerBear Have I told you about HireUp? It might be worth looking into it on their web page for you. You do your bookings directly with the support people registered on there and you get to see their profiles before that. You can book anyone in your area that you feel is a good fit and it even allows for a meet and greet session before you do bookings with someone. I do this a bit (bypassing the Coordinator of Supports) and I find it really good.

@Zoe7 can you maybe get referred for hydrotherapy or aqua physiotherapy?

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