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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 Hi Zoe7 it ended up a really great walk as my neighbour was there too. Son2 escorted the ladies :). Have a great day Zoe7 xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That is lovely for all of you @Bunniekins Those are the moments that we need to hold onto Have a great day yourself little pea

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Such a winwin for all. @Bunniekins

Go you mum!

Even just once is great for your son.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good afternoon everyone @Bunniekins @Zoe7 @Adge @saturnzoon @CheerBear @Appleblossom @Shaz51 @Exoplanet @BryanaCamp @outlander @Razzle and anyone else passing this way. Hope yesterday was good and today is going well.

Best wishes for your recovery to continue @Adge . Glad to hear the nurse visits have been extended. How on earth do you drive without bending in the middle?

@CheerBear @saturnzoon you're both right - we can only do our best that we are able to at the time. In my case I went undiagnosed bipolar 1 until 46 years old and also had complex PTSD since my teens compounded by several other major traumas, so my best was often not enough, but these days it's more of a memory I can ride out than an actual trigger @CheerBear However my adult child also has complex PTSD and at 30 is still working to recover from their childhood.

Warm thoughts to you all - I've missed too much to respond individually but am following along and seeing what's been happening for everyone.

Just back from spending the morning practising bridge with 2 ladies from the class. And yesterday was a busy one for me too. My great friend is on her way to visit (an 8 hour drive from the north) and I'm really looking forward to hanging out with her tonight. She will stay here til tomorrow morning, when she goes to a mountain retreat and I'll be doing a writing workshop all day.

So I won't be around much before Saturday and half of that is busy for me too.

Take care all and happy times.

Around for a while now if anyone wants to chat.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Have a great night with your friend tonight @eth and I very much look forward to hearing how the workshop goes tomorrow

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Have a great night with your friend tonight @eth xx

hello @Zoe7 , @Mazarita , @Appleblossom , @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 @Mazarita @Zoe7 @eth @Appleblossom @Adge @CheerBear @BryanaCamp @Exoplanet and introducing a new formite @ManicMum (the long rave is one of my favourite hangs :)). Very quiet outside atm even the plovers are silent .... I wonder if that means yet more rain .... I would like to go for another walk this morning by the water. Not much on today except coffee with daughter and some cat naps.

Wishing everyone a super pea day today. Lots of love greenpea xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hi @eth that sounds just lovely that you're spending time with your friend and going to a writing workshop! You are really living well, that's great. I hope you have a a lovely time doing all that.

hi @Bunniekins you're walking is fantastic! I haven't really exercised all week & slept late so I am well impressed with your early rising and walking every morning. I dont' know how you do it! if you have plovers nearby does that mean you live by the beach? I always think of plovers just by the shore in flocks.

hi everyone else on the thread, hope you're having a pleasant Friday.

the weather is gorgeously warm here today so I'm laundering my sheets. Won't get another opportunity to do that for I don't know how long. I'm going to try my hardest to go for a 5km walk.

Take care all

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@BryanaCamp Thanks BryanaCamp 🙂 xxx it was hard to get moving today as it has been raining on and off but I took an unbrella :). I admire all your hiking that you do that is awesome hard work. I remember once bush walking with my ex years ago and we saw a hiker and he had the biggest calves I have ever seen he was so awesomely fit incredible. Yes I do live near the beaches lol 😄 xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

thanks @Bunniekins , well I eat too much cake & biscuits for my calves to be big! not to mention beer! but you're right it is good exercise, I'm aiming to hike tomorrow - just gotta get up with my alarm not snooze away

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