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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re:@ A long rave

@CheerBear OMG! the heater!!!! I am sooooo jealous! I wish. You must live in Tassie? or in the Snowy areas of Victoria and NSW. I think I will have to move on day ....

In response to: Re:@ A long rave

Re: Re:@ A long rave

Not Tassie or snowy areas @Bunniekins, but somewhere too close to Antarctica for a chicken like me 😆🐔 It wasn't quite 10° here when I woke up and we were all shivering. We should have a nice day ahead though and then a run close to 30's for a few days. The weather here is bonkers sometimes!

In response to: Re: Re:@ A long rave

Re: Re:@ A long rave

@CheerBear well if the weather is bonkers it has to be Melbourne!! hahahaha!! but I thought Victoria's weather was still hot like ours (I am in NSW on the coast). At least I don't live in QLD I would be a very soggy pea if I did

In response to: Re: Re:@ A long rave

Re: Re:@ A long rave

Haha @Bunniekins. You can move here and become a serial weather complainer like me 😁 I thought you were a QLDer. Now I'm puzzled 😉

In response to: Re: Re:@ A long rave

Re: Re:@ A long rave

Good morning @Bunniekins and @CheerBear and anyone else around today. Might have some time to catch up properly late this afternoon. Another busy day with a support worker for 5 1/2 hrs. First the bus to psychol and back, this time she will walk on the other side of the road and also get off the bus a couple of stops before me, so another small step towards doing it by myself. Then a walk to a busy interchange to check out possible buses to use for the bridge mornings - it's in the same neighbourhood as the psychol. Then a few groceries and some time left for a walk somewhere if it's not raining (which it looks like it might - ph says 70% chance).

After tai chi and the chemist yesterday we went to check out the venue for a writing workshop I've signed up for. It's at the local uni's new building in town and is the smartest uni campus I've ever seen, found the room I need without too much trouble.

Hi @Adge sending strength and smooth recovery your way. Keep pushing for the social worker. I'd be telling every nurse that comes to try to contact them. Sometimes the squeaky wheel does get the oil.

Hope today goes smoothly for you all @Zoe7 @Adge @Exoplanet @Shaz51 (you've been quiet here lately, hope you are ok) @outlander @Appleblossom CB and GP.

In response to: Re: Re:@ A long rave

Re: Re:@ A long rave

Hello Everyone 🙂


Thinking of you Mazy @Mazarita

@Zoe7 I'm glad to hear the new job is a gentler introduction back into
your work. It sounds like things are going well there 🙂

How sweet of you @Bunniekins to introduce @Newby , the people here are all
very nice Newby, you can feel safe here 🙂

I've got a great big bundle of love for you @CheerBear , I wish I was more
like you, cheery & brave. You picked the perfect name - a happy,
strong bear 🙂 Love you

I'm so proud of everything your doing @eth , your an inspiration 🙂

Congratulations on your tiny bit of taste @Adge , & I hope your
more comfortable with all the tubes taken out! I also hope you are
able to go home today, as long as your strong enough to do so &
have managed to get some support - that's very important.

It took me a long time to be more realistic about the cost of cars
@Appleblossom , I've been getting my car serviced for about 10 years now,
but I'm over 50 so there's decades of un-serviced vehicles
& the inevitable break-downs due to that fact. I'd spend over a
thousand dollars a year, just trying to keep my car reliable. I always
get a couple of new tyres when I get a service & it gets serviced
every 6 months. I used to do a lot of it myself, but I made some
fairly simple mistakes that ended up being very costly - like over
tightening hose clamps, that lead to those clamps cutting though
the hose . . . that led to cooking the motor!!! Finally I can see that
the money I spend is worth the peace of mind I get from it 🙂

I didn't put the fan on last night & I even pulled the sheet up! 🙂
Maybe this time Autumn might kick in? I had a cooler spot for about
a week I think, I really thought 'phew' at last, but the heat came back.
It's been about 40 for a few days now, though through the night it
still did cool down, just not enough for a sheet. But this morning
I had the sheet, a fluff ball & a bowling ball of muscle, all tucked
around me 🙂 Although I've just had to change into my bra & some
short shorts 'cause the day is heating up. I know I live in a hot spot,
it's gets over 45 here, but I don't like the heat & I'm really over it
by Autumn.
I'm really liking these crocs, I need to have shoes with some support
& very comfy souls . . . you know, the knee bones connected to
the thigh bone 🙂 & if I don't wear comfortable shoes my hips play
up, & then walking just isn't so simple. I've had Birkenstocks, very
expensive & they don't handle water, Homy Peds, which I really
liked & they were what I was looking for, but they didn't have my
size in stock . . . & I ruined them with water too - come Summer
I tend to stay wet most of the time. These crocs appear to be made
for water, they're a special kind of plastic {I don't like plastic - but
they're affordable, comfortable & water-proof!}. They're not the
'clog' style, they're more like thongs only not a strap between the
toes {which I don't really like}, they have a couple of thin straps
across the foot - perfect for what I was looking for & I'm really
surprised how comfortable they are considering how thin the soul
is . . . which also makes them very light 🙂

Love to all that need or want it

@outlander @Teej @Sophia1

In response to: Re: Re:@ A long rave

Re: Re:@ A long rave

Thanks heaps @Exoplanet . Just a quickie - you can get plastic birkenstock thongs for around $70. Mine have lasted well - 2 1/2 years so far. They have great arch support (I pronate badly, have a bunion and a morton's neuroma in one foot so it's been great to find these). I simply can't afford the leather and cork ones.

Have a good day.

In response to: Re: Re:@ A long rave

Re: Re:@ A long rave

The birkenstocks were great @eth , felt a bit like magic when I first got them - but that magic faded quickly 'cause of the water. Plastic ones sound interesting {though I really don't like plastic}, I'll look into them when the crocs end 🙂 Lots of love to you

In response to: Re: Re:@ A long rave

Re: Re:@ A long rave

@Exoplanet thank you for your very kind words that made me smile lots 😊 You're very thoughtful and giving exoplanet and it's so lovely to know you here ❤

Yesterday I was at an op shop with my big one and we came across a very cool looking pair of shoes. Kind of like slip on shoes without the toes from memory. They were yellow on the bottom and had a white and black pattern on the top. I turned them over and found they were crocs! Funny timing after hearing about yours only yesterday (I think). I got mine when the only ones that were really around were the clog style ones. Comfy, light and fun but incredibly slippery inside and out if I got them wet! Great that they have them made for water now. Hope you enjoy yours for a while 🙂

I'd send you some of our weather if I could. 🤞 autumn happens soon for you.

In response to: Re: Re:@ A long rave

Re: Re:@ A long rave

morning @CheerBear @eth @Exoplanet @Mazarita @Appleblossom and all passing through

@CheerBear im halfway through my blanket, im up to roll 3 of the yarncakes.
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