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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hope you feel better soon @Mazarita

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Dearest @Mazarita

How are you ? Hello everyone else....you know who you are.

Yes, it is difficult but it is for everyone. There is a lady who lives in the complex who has her drug addicted son who is diagnosed with bipolar and is homeless and her nephew stays with her and is also struggling with times of mental ill health and......all in a one bedroom place.

How are you ? I feel a movement from you since I last saw you....you are more open or you have changed your talking or something......you have 'free ed up," does this make sence to you ?

It might be that or it might be that .......I've missed you ...... stuck in my little unit handsewing dogs for handbags......

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@PeppiPatty, how I am at the moment is just trying to heal from this chest infection I have come down with over recent days. Feeling a bit sorry for myself about my poor physical health in general over a lifetime. Sometimes seems if it's not one thing it's the other. Another part of me accepts it all.

And then I think I have so little to be feeling this way about when you describe some of what you go through, and your neighbour. In many ways, I have a good life. Just tell that to my dark and troubled moods that seem to be so senseless at times.

I'm not sure if I'm more open since you took the break from the forum. Maybe. Perhaps it's just that I go through these different mood movements across time that see me sometimes more open than others. Depends how things are at the time, perhaps.

How lovely to be missed. The feeling is mutual.

Handsewing dogs for handbags sounds like a good thing to me. I similarly spend a lot of time putting bits and pieces of image and sound together for the little videos. Sometimes my dedication to it seems absurd. Other times I appreciate just how much of a lifeline it has been over time. At the best of times, I think I'm giving something good to the world with creativity and then it seems especially worthwhile. At the least, we could be doing a lot worse!

Good to be chatting again.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

My darling @Mazarita

I need to be going very soon because Im working hard on this handbag and have it finished .......

Do you mind if I answer you tomorrow ? I'lle also have the bag finished so can take a photo of it.........The feeling is definately mutual,,,,when you did the video tape of my poem..........wow.....

You also get work from your art.....I keep on giving my art away........

xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@PeppiPatty, look forward to seeing the photo tomorrow! It was a special thing for me too, to make the video with your poem. Nightie night. ox

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hi @Shaz51

How are you this morning ?

Guess what? We are getting a very old friend to train our dog Arlo on Saturday.......He's Mr Barker of the century.......

But I wish I could get my hair done too so I am booking in next week :0)

We need care ourselves don't we ?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Former-MemberI found your story sad and interesting. H mmmm . Maybe you will not know if the visitors had permits, but I would think they would not leave carcasses behind like that. Hmmmm. However culling is an uncomfortable reality for city slickers. We tend to romanticise the bush ...

I love the proprietary way you talk about YOUR forest. I do that sometimes about places I have loved.

@Mazarita

Choosing "in the nest" days . ... good idea ... hope you are over chest infection and lans for procedure are good.

@PeppiPattyYes most people struggle.

So lovely to have you around again.

@Shaz51

Hope you all come through.

Cheers @outlander

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Appleblossom, thanks for your thoughts. I am feeling quite a lot better today, though still coughing up muck and have slept a lot. But I've since had a shower, which has improved wellbeing, and am in the process of doing my washing. Bed is made. It's nice to start moving out of my sick and feral mode. I have a doctors appointment tomorrow for B12 shot which is due and some other things that need checking. Will be good to get out of the flat after so many days inside. How are you going at the moment?

Hi @PeppiPatty, @Shaz51 and everyone, sending good vibes for the rest of your day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Just after 3am as I start to write. I'm very tired but can't get myself to bed. That's partly because I know if I go to bed I am going to be coughing a lot, possibly violently. I tried to sleep in the armchair earlier. That was after having a relapse tonight of the asthma symptoms from this chest cold. I calmed down my breathing and coughing, but wasn't sleeping in the chair after a long time. So back up again. I feel naughty because I should be trying to sleep. I need it for physical healing, as well as mental health. Why am I here then?

At least I don't do these super late nights as often as I used to.

But really, why don't I take better care of myself? I guess there has to be some part of me that doesn't think I'm worth it. Still! I mean in my conscious mind, I sort of do, I think. But I neglect myself in these basic and crucial ways. It's as though that behaviour is from the unconscious. Where perhaps there is some hopelessness about various things (and the shame and guilt I've been talking about with my psychologist). Even as I try to find peace and contentment with what has been dealt me, and what I've dealt myself, something in me seems to undermine that. And yet, I have sought to make friends with my unconscious over the course of my life, often through creativity.

Still, not all is bad. I showered, did a load of washing and made the bed today. And walked out the front to check the mail. Not sure I'm going to make it to the doctors tomorrow though. Supercell storms are forecast for SE Qld. I have to go to the doctors by bus and walking. Not sure what to do, will decide in the morning.

I also already cancelled my psychologist and massage appointments this week. What a nuisance is this cold. I have started to think I might need to go to emergency a few times there. The breathing has been badly affected. Interesting though that I was really able to help calm down my distressed breathing, and seemingly improve the asthma, by doing some meditation and counted breathing in the armchair for about 45 minutes.

Anyway, all is okay. I'll probably sit back down in the armchair to try for sleep soon. In the meantime, this is really just middle-of-the-night raving...

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@MazaritaHoping you are getting on top this chest thing.

You have achieved a lot of stability in the way you relate on this forum.

Undermining myself is sometimes subtle, it creeps up, other times its full on and direct.

Today I asked my pdoc about Dx. I like that he questioned me as to why I wanted a diagnosis and he is careful with labelling and started talking "BiPolar Mixed State" about me. I did some research but it immediately felt a fair call. He wanted to say I was resilient, but with the escalation of my son's situation atm he knew he had to say something. .

You probably knew all along I had the same thing ..

I mentioned all the other possibles. He agreed we would be working together on a formulation. He knows I do my research and has respect so in that sense I have come along way and have a lot more support in place that when I joined the forum and was out on a limb. I do hope we will have a good outcome and get best practise in place so I am not completely upset. My son has had second manic episode which has been big stress but we are coming through it a bit more today. He phoned and was talking with insight and less manic.

Thanks for walking with me or just being staunchly you whilst I was wildly casting about for help.

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