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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hope your psychologist appointment went well @eth and you got your shopping done. I have done a little shopping today but didn't get to the fruit and veggie shop - too wet and too tired - so will probably go on Friday after work. I did make it to the chemist though so that is a start.

Hi @Bunniekins Hope you are having a better day today and melancholy little pea has 'left the building'

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Exoplanet @Bunniekins @Mazarita @eth

Just saying helloooooo ...

Feeling good tonight.

I visited my old choir friend, had dinner in her aged care place and watched a little tele.

Came home to pick up son, but missed him after yoga. I drove back and forward looking for him, but thank god a nice lady gave him a lift home.

Now just sorting out diary for next few months and catching up online.

@CheerBear Proud of you doing the difficult things as a mum. Bike rides are wonderful ways to "iron out" wobblies???

I cannot understand why anyone would make that kind of thing ... I really feel strongly about that kind of twisted and being clear that mental illness does not usually mean those kinds of thoughts, emotions or behaviours.

Cheers All

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning to @Appleblossom @Mazarita @Zoe7 @eth @Exoplanet @CheerBear @outlander and everyone who pass this way today. Busy day ahead with son2 walk to the bakery then later going to a cafe with family :D. Hoping everyone has a lovely day. Lots of love greenpea xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning everyone

@Bunniekins hope you enjoy your bakery visit and cafe with family 🙂

@Appleblossom thank you for your reply to our cyber shake up. I read your post in the small hours of this morning and it felt good to come across. Great to hear you were feeling good last night and that someone kind helped your son.

I woke today sneezy and sniffly. It's currently 7° with a 'feels like' temp of 3° and I'm thinking the huge change in weather is probably behind my sniffles. I have a few things on and really don't need a cold lingering around.

Today I meet with my support coordinator and I'm not thrilled about it as we've clashed recently. I will have to try to keep my NDIS frustration in check today. I'm making a big layered rainbow cake so that's something to look forward to after the meeting at least.

Hope it's a good start to the day for all ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello Everyone 🙂

It didn't cool off this morning, in fact I woke up hot! It was nice to get a break from it for a week or so at least. The beach sure is sounding good 🙂 It's really high humidity, which isn't the norm for around here - over %80! The weather site is promising a storm . . . we'll see 😉 . . . not a cloud in the sky right now. I was so hoping the heat was over. I've gotta give the car a bit of a clean up, well . .. in the cab at least, I never wash it as such, there's never enough water for that. It's booked in for a service & new tyres on Monday, that'll make it pretty perfect for going on a trip 😉 This beach {it's a caravan park, so I don't know how I'll go with it} is an off-lead, dog friendly beach! 😄 I like the sound of that! 🙂

Love to all that need or want it

@Mazarita @eth @CheerBear @Appleblossom @Bunniekins @outlander @Faith-and-Hope @Zoe7

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning everyone

@Bunniekins @Zoe7 @Appleblossom @CheerBear Hope this morning is going ok for you all and anyone else reading this. @Exoplanet @Adge you too.

Trust your meeting goes better than anticipated @CheerBear and that you can get some of the supports you want put in place. Remember, within core supports funds can be moved from one category to another (that may help you get more the type of support you want). I asked for MH qualified workers, not just peer workers with lived experience. But they do take longer to find.

@Bunniekins sounds like a nice day with your son.

@Appleblossom how frustrating driving around looking for your son. Glad to hear he was safe in the end.

@Zoe7 hope you're having a good day at school.

@Adge sending support and hugs as you get closer to your big day, and much hope that all goes well with your procedure and the outcome is all you hope.

I have a morning at home today which I've been looking forward to. Have to read over this week's bridge lesson and then this afternoon a few of us are having a social practice game at one lady's home. She's a real sweetie and is picking me up and bringing me home afterwards. It's a whole new thing (well it's been many, many years) for me becoming friendly with new people in a social setting by myself (no other family or support worker) - learning again how to interact in 'normal' ways without disclosing my health stuff or trauma history - for a long time now I've only had communication with family, sw's and therapists. So I get anxious about these type of get togethers, but I think it will get easier as we get to know each other a bit and I 'progressively desensitize' as my psychologist calls it. Definitely stretching my comfort zone. I have had to explain a little about why I can't transport myself one way or another and the way it happened left me going over and over what I'd said, but it is what it is. The woman I've teamed up with asked me how come I still have a car. I said I hadn't driven for 2 1/2 years. She spoke about her son developing epilepsy and losing his licence for that reason. So I said it's not that with me, that I have dissociated when driving in the past (didn't say what triggered it or what was going on at the time), but I keep the car registered because I hope to drive again. So the 'dissociated' part kept echoing on me afterwards. I'm so afraid of being judged even though the group is proving to be friendly and interesting and have their own tales to tell. Yesterday I bought a couple of long-sleeved shirts to cover my tatoos and scars - I feel like I might seem too hippy or risky to this crowd.

Psychologist ap't yesterday was good - mostly catching her up to my recent increase in activities and identifying progress on my goals, and talking about how current family relationships are going. We will start the EMDR again next week. She explained how it's opening new brain pathways and how it continues to work between sessions and we identified aspects of my changes recently that are a little easier and less triggering than I have experienced in the not so distant past. She is very reassuring.

That's my rave for today.

Take care all xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

So much great stuff happening for/with you @eth 😊 Awesome to read. Hope you enjoy your social afternoon. It's taken me a little while to come around to the idea of "those who mind dont matter and those who matter don't mind" re my fear of being judged in social situations. For what it's worth, I have a feeling you'd be great fun to hang out with ❤

@Exoplanet your beach adventure sounds like heaps of fun! Hope you and the dogs enjoy it ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks a lot @CheerBear I reckon you'd be great company too. Well you are, here! What are you up to today? I do agree with the expression you quoted and have been known to say it to others but I feel like I don't want to 'come out' all the way with this group. I do have some good stories to tell but need to get used to telling them without adding 'of course I was manic at the time'!

@Bunniekins forgot to answer you - I've decided to do keto chicken meatballs with cauliflower rice and roast tomatoes for one group meal and ratatouille with chicken thigh fillets for the other. Have cut back to cooking for the clan only one night a week which is far better for my food budget. I shop fortnightly and yesterday cost me around $80 less than what I've spent recently (as I have a bunch of the needed ingredients in my pantry already).

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth 😊 I can imagine the tricky in the "I was manic at the time" stories.

I've been up to the shop already and just walked out of an ultrasound I've been avoiding for too long so two of the things I kind of needed to do today are ✔ already. Aside from my support coordinator coming around soonish (I said no to going in to her office as the thought of it felt like entering a lion's den the other day 😏) all I have on now is making loads of sugary buttery deliciousness for the rainbow cake and mess in the kitchen with my playing 😁🌈

How are you spending your home morning?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Your cake sounds wonderful and fun to make @CheerBear . Hope you get good results on your ultrasound. So far I've just had coffee, got dressed, made the bed and come on here. I've been missing my morning sesh on here lately. Yet to go through my bridge lessons in prep for a social game this afternoon. Waiting for my brain to get up to speed!

Just overheard a snippet of conversation between sil and her mum which sounds like the pool workmen will still be around after they all (bro, sil and her mum) go overseas in mid April for a month. I've been half expecting but dreading that outcome on the pool installation. Hopefully (very) sil's brother will be around to manage all that.

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