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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @CheerBear very much hoping your day has improved by now. It must be very triggering hearing that sort of noise from you neighbours. I used to get very hypervigilant at times like that. Sorry to hear you had a bad night already before that. You have big changes coming this week with the start of the support worker which might have been underlying your disturbed sleep. I'm always anxious before starting with anyone new.

I suggest looking over your goals (as listed in your NDIS plan) beforehand and trying to think of activities that align with them, and then doing the same with the sw when they come. Helping you work out the steps to a goal is part of their job. My first sessions with new people were usually mostly a meet and greet and telling them about myself, my challenges and what I need help with. I have a more detailed list of 7 goals that I had prepared for my planning meeting (NDIS consolidated them into only 2 short term and 1 long term) which I usually photocopy for them too. The sw will probably have questions for you too. I had to keep telling myself to remember that it was a good thing that was about to happen, something I had fought for and wanted, despite it being scary.

Here to support you if you want to talk about it more and get clearer about it.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning also to @Shaz51 @Appleblossom @Adge @Exoplanet @Zoe7 @Bunniekins @outlander @Faith-and-Hope and of course you too @Mazarita .

Maz I trust that you're enjoying the challenges of your new position and focus but just want you to know I'm thinking of you. Sending warm wishes.

Great news about your mum's progress @Shaz51 .

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth A very quiet morning for me here. Got some washing on and started the washing up but taking it very slowly. Nothing much planned today apart from housework and a little planning for school. How is your day looking?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

A day at home for me @Zoe7 . Will help with some housework in the big house, move some more piles of mulch (should be the last of that job thank goodness), do my bridge homework and have a game later with sil's mum. Should go get into the housework shortly.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That is super nice of you to help with the housework in the big house @eth I have a lot of housework I need to do today - but not going to push it too far if I start getting tired again. Some of it can wait but getting the washing, washing up and vacuuming done will be my priorities. Need also to wash the floor but that can definitely wait - Toby and Cat will no doubt drag in more grass and dirt throughout the week - it is a constant battle keeping the floors clean with two fur babies lol

It will be nice to have the mulch moved finally. I have a lot of weeding to do in the garden but that will definitely need to wait - too much inside to get done first at the moment.

Have fun playing bridge with your sil's mum after doing your homework first. Hope you have a lovely day with all that you have planned

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning to @eth @Mazarita @Zoe7 @CheerBear @Shaz51 @Adge @outlander and everyone. Wishing you all a wonderful Sunday. I have been out in the front couryard cleaning up after the pruning and feel very satisfied with the result :). Now for the backyard .....xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Bunniekins You have already achieved a lot for the morning then. I was up super early today and have already done one load of washing, have a second one on and have washed up and cleaned the microwave. Next is putting some clothes away and maybe doing some ironing so I have more clothes sorted for the week ahead at work.

Going to colour and cut my hair later if I have enough energy left but it is more likely that I will have a nap lol

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @eth @CheerBear @Zoe7 @Bunniekins & everyone.

I just had my hair cut, yesterday afternoon - no.4 with the clippers.

So I'm all shawn & dapper now...

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm sure you look super smart @Adge 😁 What are your plans for today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks for your understanding and insight @eth. I think my main worry is that this worker isn't going to be a good fit and with such a long appointment, it's going to suck if we don't click.

Hope your Sunday is going well.

Hi and thanks for the call outs @Bunniekins and @Adge 🙂 Yay for the haircut adge. As someone with 2/3rds of mine at a number 2, I get how good it can feel to be neatly shorn 😁 Love rubbing my hands over my head when it is freshly done!

👋 to you also @Zoe7
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