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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Glad to hear you got some good rest this morning @CheerBear I know how rare it is for you to have that little extra bit in the morning.

I just worked out that I do need to get meds today so will likely use the walk to the shops and back as my exercise - on top of the workout I'm about to get moving mulch in the garden.

Yes I've had a much busier time the last two weeks. Started some new activities - creative writing workshop, bridge lessons (14 week course), craft workshop on future intentions, plus 2 smoking cessation counselling sessions all on top of my usual essential appointments and erands. Going to tai chi 2 x a week now instead of 1 too.

So many new faces in such a short period of time, and huge nerves at times, but overall it's gone pretty well. Stepped up from 3 to 5 days out a week for the forseeable future. Hoping I can keep up with it. Bridge has homework plus trying to have a 2nd game each week with my sil's mum next door.

Heading out to the garden now - catch up later this afternoon perhaps.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I often have a face that looks like this 😁 at your posts @eth and hearing how much you're getting out of a comfort zone and enjoying it! Go you 🎉 All of that sounds awesome.

We're heading out overnight to visit well and unwell one and their new puppy. We'll take our little baby cat 'Rocket' to play too which we're looking forward to. Rocket is incredibly bold and playful so she'll cope with the car trip and the stay away (and hopefully the puppy) 🤞 Might catch you later but may also be busy with all the babies 👩‍👧‍👦🐶🐱😊 Either way, have a great day ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Adge how are you travelling today?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth @Bunniekins @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom

Good morning & have a good weekend.

Yes I need to write stuff down, that helps.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

SNAP! @Adge we posted at the same time!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Wow, do we get a prize for that one @eth ?

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Happy Day Everyone 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks for your kind words @eth

I must remind myself that I'm resilient.

I've done some journal writing, that helps.

I'm so zonked today, feeling overwhelmed & so dopey (not with it).

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It's no wonder you're feeling what you describe today @Adge . For me it's quite common to have a delayed reaction to major triggers. And it's also common after an anger rush combined with a shock. Glad to hear the journal writing has helped a bit. Be gentle with yourself if you can. What things do you do for self-care? For me even just reading some fiction or watching telly can help me distance myself from the big stuff. Whatever chills you out. Sometimes it's some craft or planning and cooking a favourite meal. Sometimes sitting outside quietly or doing some gardening. Sometimes it's a soak in a warm bath or a shower, imagining all the stress and hurt washing away. Only you know what works for you. Thinking of you and sending hugs.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks for "normalising" my reactions @eth That's a term the psychs use.

I mean it was quite a big (major) trigger.

It helps to hear that I'm not the only one with delayed reactions.

I do have delayed reactions, especially when overwhelmed by things.

The shock came first, then anger, now it's mostly shock again.

Self-care is alway a "Bug-Bear" - because I know it's important, yet nothing works very well for me.

Those are excellent suggestions, probably even more necessary when feeling down (or yukky).

I had a Hypnotherapy session this afternoon - that helped to relax & ground me a bit.

He wants me to do some creative drawing - because I had some very colourful visualisations, during the session (rare for me).

I might try to watch a DVD movie (Eragon), if I can make myself sit still long enough to watch it.

Hugs to you too.

Adge

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