FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

1,741 - 1,750 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, what time today do you leave? Looks like we've almost met in real time, wonder if you are still around.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita Great timing! I don't go until this afternoon around 3 to the airport. I want to keep occupied this morning so I don't have time to be anxious.

How are you today? How did yesterday go for you?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yay, we meet, @eth

Yesterday was a write off day. Slept a lot of it. Today I was going to try to get to yoga in the morning but I am too groggy to get ready and out on the bus to get there, and to actually do yoga at this time of day. I really think I might be sick trying to yoga in the state I'm in of a morning. That's three failures to make it to the class in a row. I may give up on that class at this point. Trouble is I haven't been able to find any in the afternoon around here. Ah well, will consider that problem a bit further and may find a way to solve it (or not).

Are you all packed and ready to go?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita It's understandable that you're not making it to yoga. Hoping you can find a class that's on later in the day. Maybe the teacher of this course would know of one, or start one at a better time if you talk to them about it. It's possible others have the same problem. I don't think you need any pressure on top of what's already happening for you - that would defeat the purpose of going to yoga in my book. Another possibility would be to check out stretch routines to do at home. There are lots online. One style I heard of recently is Forest Yoga (Forrest sp.?) which seems really gentle. They have info online that I've seen.

Yes I'm pretty much packed except for last minute things like the phone charger that are going in my handbag. I usually keep the list from the previous trip as a prompt for the list for the current trip - how's that for anxiety prevention/OCD?!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, I don't think keeping a list of things is OCD. If so, I have it too. I always make lists when I'm travelling. Otherwise I get lost in all the small details that need to be remembered. To me, it seems like using you last trip's list is a saving on making a new one this time around, way to go.

I will look up Forest or Forrest Yoga. I am definitely interested more in the gentle end of the yoga scale. I feel disappointed in myself for not making it three weeks in a row. But, as is often the case in the morning, I have diarrhea (from the Crohns). It will settle as the hours go by but yoga and D don't mix very well!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita D would make it impossible to do a yoga session and is out of your control so try not to give yourself a hard time about not going. Can you eat oats? They have a herbal action that might help. Good old porridge. But I guess not as too much fibre.

When I'm doing charts for moods, sleep and metamucil/motions I have more than a few lists on the go at the same time. Like you said, once it's written down I don't have to remember it all. Another is for shopping, another is for jobs that need to be done ... I almost need a list of my lists!

I think there's also a Forest Yoga fb page that has links to videos. And they are on YouTube I think.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks, @eth. It's weird how I know I can't do some things due to physical limitations but my mind still beats itself up over a perceived 'failure'. Eventually I may learn. I guess it's that I'm constantly negotiating these physical limitations, trying to challenge them, and the line between thinking you are unable and actually being unable seems blurry at times.

The list of lists, there you may be going a bit too far, lol.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita It must be frustrating having to negotiate with your physical health all the time. I hear you.

Did you make it to your friend visit yesterday? How did that go?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, thanks again.

We changed times for seeing my friend yesterday. I will be seeing her Friday or Sunday now instead, yet to be confirmed.

Eth, I'm going back to bed as I'm still very groggy and tired. I may be back on again before you leave. If not, see you in about a week and have a great time!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sleep well and deeply @Mazarita I get back next Thursday afternoon, so I'll catch you then if not later today. Sometimes sleep is the best medicine and you are dealing with a lot at the moment. I'll be thinking of you and sending you peace and strength

1,741 - 1,750 of 27,230