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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

The river sunrise

The dairy cows

The mountain backdrop

The river rainbow

I'm back home. I spent the day with my daughter & it was good. My youngest grand child has been diagnosed autistic, that made me a little sad, to see him & he's still not talking & still quite angry. I missed 1 grandbaby, the 2nd youngest was visiting a friend, but someone handed me a phone & there she was - I still got to see her . . . & her friend, I even got a tour of the friends unit! I could feel anxiety taking hold as it got close to people arriving for the birthday dinner, so I said my goodbyes & headed back to camp - the photo with the rainbow is what greeted me on my return 🙂 I feel a bit better about this trip then others, it just feels like it didn't happen, not like it wasn't real & for me that feels better. The first photo is of a beautiful sunrise that I took at about 5am, I'd already been awake for hours, I think I told you all about the drama's with the staffy on the first night - he slept soundly for the next couple 🙂 The 2nd photo is of the cows, as I was camping on a dairy farm. The 3rd photo is of the mountain that was directly behind the river in front of my camp site, the area was surrounded by mountains. It really was lovely 😄

Love to all that need or want it

@Mazarita @eth @outlander @Bunniekins @Appleblossom @Teej @Sophia1 @Shaz51 @PeppiPatty @CheerBear

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @outlander @Bunniekins @eth

Wishing you all a good day too.

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

😯 @Exoplanet! Love those photos (especially the rainbow one!) 💗

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Good morning eth 🙂 wishing you a wonderful day ..... already nearly the afternoon time flies. What have you got on for the rest of the day? I will do a bit of yoga I think. Have started a new book which I can already tell is going to be good 🙂

@Mazarita Missing you Mazzy. Hope you are well. Love greenpea xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Exoplanet Gosh I thought the photos were paintings they are so perfect :). I am glad the visit went well for you :). My son2 has autism (amongst other problems) if you ever want to talk about autism I would be more than happy to. I think one of the main things new parents and grandparents want to know is about the future for their autistic children, I know I did. Have a great day Exoplanet and thank you again for your beautiful photos. Love greenpea xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Adge Good morning Adge 🙂 wishing you a wonderful day ahead. Have you on anything specific on today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins It seems the only thing that is going to 'be done' or 'help' him, is a special school - one that has a pediatrician. I know I'll have no 'say' or influence, but I am interested in how to manage the anger & hitting & whether it's the same for all that are autistic? My daughter said it was like he had to hurt someone & then if they acted sad he would be very loving - do you know if that's common?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Exoplanet My son2 is verbal (albeit in a strange way). Autistic youngsters get very frustrated not being able to communicate and therefore act out their frustrations with hitting and biting. It is very common.... how old is your grandson? If he is young he may still get language which would be wonderful. It was along time before my son2 could speak. Best thing to do is for them to have heaps of contact with youngsters their own age where they can mirror themselves off. Playgroups and childcare programs - don't just rely upon special school make it a mix so they have 'normal' kids outside the family to 'play' with. My son2 is 25 and he is still improving so don't give up it is a long slow process and beware of the teenage years they are the worst, really the worst but will pass in time.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Exoplanet Also speak to him all the time don't let him go into his own world too often. Keep the dialogue going. It is very important that they are not allowed to retreat from real life. Be calm but firmly say something like are you upset when he hits out. Has something made you sad or angry. He could just be telling you that he is overwhelmed by stimuli in the room and needs time out. It could be anything that makes him hit out and that is the problem finding out his language.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

This is a bit late but just read abouot your reading thing and that sounds very exciting for you @eth I look forward to hearing how it goes if you read next time. That takes courage and is such a huge step for you - I think that you are even thinking about doing that is wonderful Hon

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