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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi EVERYONE, I’ve made it through my first long day of 4 long days I have to get through. Drove 250kms today for the engagement party. Lots of stops along the way. Staying in a motel tonight. My mum was getting tired, and to be honest I was starting to want to retreat, so we’re back at the motel.

Drive home tomorrow, have to go to town on Monday for a few appointments, then Tuesday I drive 250kms in the opposite direction of today for a medical appointment for mum, then home again that afternoon.

1 day down, 3 to go

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Exoplanet Hi Exoplanet well done on the camping adventure :D. I wonder why the camp ground is so busy as schools are all back it is strange ... anyway at least you have given it a go. Hope you slept well with the pump! I am such a light sleeper I don't know if I would be able to sleep with a pump going then again it could end up being like white noise which helps me sleep.

HUGE power line yep at least you have tried it. I hope you and your puppies have a great time regardless. Love greenpea xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @eth @Mazarita @CheerBear @Bunniekins @Zoe7 @Exoplanet @Razzle and all

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Glad you made it @Exoplanet despite those things that can be annoting you have set up and been for a swim. Enjoy the experience as best you can and I hope you daughter has a nice birthday.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Well done on the first of 4 days being done @Razzle Take it one day at a time Hon that is all you can do really otherwise it will be too overwhelming. Good luck with your appointments tomorrow

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

First half of the night I slept really deeply, I'd have to say it was a beautiful sleep! But then the Staffy started whinging. He has this problem where he won't poop on lead or on the chain - I think he feels he has to be where no-one can see him. I put him in the cage & completely covered it & he settled for a little while, but started again in a while; I put him back on the chain but left the cage door open so he could decide where he wanted to go - but that didn't help. Eventually I put him on a short chain up the back of the ute with me, & well . . . . I guess he just couldn't hold it any longer!!! I got him out before there was any real mess, but that was the end of sleep for me. I'm planning on a nap today, one problem may be that there's no trees here - so no shade, but it's pretty overcast & looking a lot like rain; so I guess that'll be the next thing. Despite all that it's wonderful to see the water, I saw an absolutely magnificent sun rise, & I reckon it's worth it to have gotten out of my back yard 🙂 It's actually my youngest grandbabies birthday today, so I'll send a message, I have a card with some money in it to give her tomorrow when I visit my baby on her birthday. I know it's going to be awkward but it will also be worth it

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi everyone @Exoplanet @Razzle @outlander @Bunniekins @Zoe7 @Mazarita @CheerBear @Adge @Shaz51 hope today has started nicely. I've already been to the beach with bro and sil and her brother. It was gorgeous this morning. Still not taking the plunge in cold water, but I did paddle and get wet up to the waist so I figure I still got my dose of ozone.

I haven't mentioned it recently but sil's bro came to live here in the house next door with her mum. He arrived yesterday. Until he gets on his feet. He's had a recent detox from alcohol and a sedative, got caught high range driving, lost his license, is 50yo and talks a lot with lots of swearing (Lots!). Some of the time it feels like he has no 'filter' with others. And there has been talk in the past about the possibility he has undiagnosed bipolar (I have bipolar 1 and cPTSD). So it's a mixed bag of challenges having him here, quite a source of anxiety for me but I just have to roll with it as best I can. We had yummy bbq baramundi last night to welcome him. Lots I could say here but that's enough for now.

@Razzle I hope you get through your huge days ok and manage to get good rest between the big drives. And that all the appointments go well.

@Exoplanet Everything else that happened in the night aside, your magnificent sunrise must have been good for the soul. Hope your meet-up with your family goes smoothly.

@Zoe7 I hope you woke feeling hopeful about your new position and relieved about the details.

@Adge hope you have a better day.

Thinking of you @Mazarita @Bunniekins @CheerBear @Shaz51 Hope you're coping and that the water's receding @Shaz51

Back to you @outlander and to all else here today too xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That is a bid deal having 2 more people living close by @eth - especially if there are challenges you have to get around. I can imagine that your anxiety would increase with more people being close by. I hope your little space you have created for yourself doesn not feel too invaded and they keep away a much as possible. Your bro and SIL sound like very caring people though - bringing family close in times of need - you are very lucky to have them in your life and I know from what you have said that they are very supportive of you. Nice to go to the beach with them this morning - having a paddle of a warm morning sounds wonderful. Hope the rest of your day is a good one

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Good morning eth wishing you a wonderful day ahead. Yesterday sounds fabulous. Good on you getting yourself wet! I have to agree with you having a 50 year old male around who swears would ,make me very anxious. Nothing to be done though unfortunately I suppose. Hopefully he will calm down over time. Love greenpea xxx

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In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Zoe7 and @Bunniekins Much appreciated. I will definitely do my best to have boundaries about/around him. Very much hoping he will stay off the grog and pills, but I know how common relapsing is during the process of giving up. I worked hard to give up pot several years ago so in a way I can't judge him, but that doesn't mean I don't have to stay aware of potential triggers with him here.

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