FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

17,161 - 17,170 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 That's great that Faith-and-Hope will be back soon for you as I know it has been hard on you because you both are so close. You have done well though and as you say not much longer now. You both will have so much to talk about. Will be great having her back again @Faith-and-Hope xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It is so nice have that super close connection on here with one person but I also so much value the other friendships I have here too @Bunniekins I have missed her so much but there have been people that have stepped to fill that void somewht and that is super special to me - that is why I love this place so much - so much support and so many caring people that just get it. I was really worried about @Faith-and-Hope being away and how I would cope but those people - especially @CheerBear - have made it so much easier for me and that I am so very grateful for.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry I disappeared @Zoe7 @Bunniekins @CheerBear Bro was going to the post office so I went along for the walk. It's good to be getting a bit more exercise (still not a lot!) lately. I've actually even been on the ex bike twice this week.

Hope today is going well so far, especially for you @Zoe7 .

It was nice to glimpse you in real time this morning @Mazarita and great to be keeping up with what's going on for you lately.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi everyone, @eth @Zoe7 @Bunniekins and anyone else that’s about. Lots happening on this thread, have spent a little time catching up. Thought I’d duck in real quick now before life gets

real busy in about 1/2hr. Hope everyone is having a nice day. I’ll try and check in again later

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Razzle Hi Razzle good to 'see' you 🙂 might catch up later if you get back on. If not have a great day :)xxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Razzle I read elsewhere that you are not having such a good day - sorry that things are feeling overwhelming for you today. Sending you hugs and love

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi to you too @Razzle hope this afternoon has been a better one for you. There is a thread called The Weekly Friday Feast that you might enjoy and meet new people that starts around 7pm every Friday.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth I keep forgetting about Friday feast. Might jump over now and have a look 👍👍

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Zoe7

Just got a little overwhelmed, actually a lot overwhelmed, it’s been quite the struggle the last few weeks. I need a little breathing space but just can’t seem to manage it. I’ve resorted to having a drink tonight, haven’t done it for a while, but I really need to take the edge off tonight

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It does get like that when everything gets to you @Razzle So sorry you are feeling so overwhelmed Hon and it has been such a struggle for you over the last few weeks. I know you have been having relationship issues and that completely sucks. Very much feeling for you @Razzle

17,161 - 17,170 of 27,230