FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

16,971 - 16,980 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

You have great listening eyes @eth thanks 🙂 This experience is a first for us. I try and keep the ages/levels of mine quietish here which I know makes it a bit hard to follow along with but I need to. I've probably also failed at that this last little while so um hoping posts get buried a bit if that makes sense. They've calmed down a little now with some encouragement to let it go today and then some firm "this is enough for tonight" when that didn't work. The others are training a fluffy new addition to walk up and around an obstacle course made out of boxes which is a bit cute 🙂

How's your afternoon been? What do you think you'll find yourself up to tonight?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Bahahaha @eth! That pic is gold 😂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear I love that expression 'listening eyes' .. that's exactly what we do here. I totally understand about your not wanting too much detail about your kids on here. Didn't mean to pry. I was just thinking that transition to big school is possible the most stressful for the eldest - I am the eldest in my family and I recall having a lot more anxiety than my siblings seemed to.

Glad you liked the picture.

What do you have planned for this evening? Is there another week before school starts or is it this week coming?

Just me tonight, probably left over Thai yellow curry of veg and tofu that I made Friday night with a small salad. Sil has asked me to try not to do dinners using the oven for a few weeks coz it makes the house too hot so I'm looking for chicken or vego dinners that can be done entirely on the stove top if you have any suggestions.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I didnt take your questions as prying at all @eth 😊 Just wanted to explain what might be a bit of vagueness at times. I feel the same about being the eldest and hope this is just part of that. It seems to have been for the other changes. Being the biggest is kind of like being a crash test dummy at times 😆

They're back this week. I can almost start them walking now 😉👍

Not much on tonight. I'm super tired. I have dishes and dinner to do then might watch some tv (probably away from kids). Friend wants to come around but I'm not up to it tonight. I'm trying to let some guilt about that go. Will probably cave though 😏

Yum with the yellow curry!!! I'll have a think about what we do stove top. I have a feeling our food might be a bit bland for you though as you have such colourful sounding food tastes! We're having some gyoza (store bought) with salad tonight. So good!

Noticed you around also @Zoe7 and a 👋 and ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @CheerBear @Mazarita @Bunniekins @Shaz51

@eth

I treated myself to Paul Kelly's songbook for christmas.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Gyoza with salad sounds good to me @CheerBear . I quite like more basic food and so does my brother but sil has fancier tastes. I'm constantly looking for new recipes that are easy enough for me to do. The curry was just done with bought curry paste and coconut milk and the veg and then I fried the tofu in 2cm blocks and added it in. What flavour gyoza do you like?

Hi @Appleblossom what a great gift to give yourself. I'm sure there'll be some gems in there. He's such a great poet as well as musician. I watched him live at the opera house on ABC last night.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

what a great gift to give yourself., I agree @Appleblossom

hello @Mazarita, @eth, @CheerBear, @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Shaz51 how's your day been?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sounds great @Appleblossom 😊 hope things are going well in your world at the moment.

Just vegetarian gyoza in whatever flavour that is we buy it in @eth. I am not adventurous with food. Your curry sounds great! I struggle to find vego curries. I also used to loooove chicken curry so I think I always compare vego and chicken and nothing quite seems to match how much I loved certain chicken curries! I had an amazing lentil one the other day from a restaurant though. It was almost a soupy dish. Would love to find a recipe that tasted the same!

👋 @Shaz51 ❤

As easy as dinner is tonight, it's not making itself so I'd better head off.

Nice to catch you all 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

love that expression 'listening eyes' .. that's exactly what we do here. -- I agree @eth, @CheerBear, @Appleblossom

I think I need to train my listening eyes more I think xx

16,971 - 16,980 of 27,230