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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hope the vet goes well for kitten today, @CheerBear, and that there's no extra expense. I feel sorry for the mouse cat. I imagine it could be a case of sibling rivalry, even though mouse cat may be too old for that. Or else mouse cat is just set in their ways and doesn't like the new reality of having to factor in now the social presence of a new cat. It might feel like their life will never be the same. Wow, having written all that, I think I could have an alternative life as a cat psychologist.

I have a long appointment with my GP today, for my first ever all-over skin check. I have barely ever worn sunscreen in my life, as I have bad allergic skin reactions to it. I also think it's horrible to wear, which probably explains why my trials of different brands of sunscreen have been very limited. In any case, good idea to have skin checks.

I saw my GP towards the end of last week too. This means I am relatively recently showered, hehe. Will be having another this morning, since my skin will be subject to close examination.

Anything planned ahead for today with you, aside from the vet?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Haha with the cat psychologist @Mazarita. If there was a job like that I would love to have a go at it. I find everything about cat behaviour fascinating. I love watching their personalities come through with their body language. Mouse is only 2 and a half and told me that she doesn't like the idea of sharing me or her bed (my bed) or her blanket (my blanket) 😆 Mouse has my heart and I think I have hers and I think this is uncertainty and some naturally territorial behaviour. I've kept kitten away from my room (her zone) and that will hopefully help a bit. Kitten will learn who is boss eventually.

Good stuff with the showering and getting to your appointments. Hope the skin check goes OK. That sucks with the sunscreen 😏 We were out for a few hours in the sun yesterday and I forgot sunscreen. My nose and cheeks are feeling it today. The sun has such a bite, it would be hard not being able to wear sunscreen in it.

Not much planned for me/us today. I've been feeling flat, tired and a bit off in general. It's made it hard to get out and about or do much over the last week. I probably should start looking at what the kids need and what else is left of Bigs list to start back at school soon. Maybe I can do that today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hugs for the flat and tired, @CheerBear (I kind of read it at first as you have a flat tyre!) Hope those feelings improve very soon, today even! School prep sounds like a useful thing to do today. Have you been crafting much lately? I'm thinking it's probably been too hot.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I haven't been crafting much (at all) @Mazarita. It has been a bit hot which makes craft with yarn not as fun, as you'd expect. I think that flat tyre 😉😆 is playing into that too a bit. I seem to be having a bit of the opposite feelings to you in that way at the moment. Maybe when the kids go back to school I'll find my happy place with it more easily.

How did the piece for the magazine go? Have you finished writing it?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, hope the heatwave eases up soon across the country, especially for @Exoplanet! It's really not as bad here, being so close to the ocean, but I'm still finding this summer much more difficult than usual and am spending huge swathes of time inside with the aircon and fan both going. Never used the aircon so much before, usually only occasionally. Very grateful for it this year, though also feel a bit guilty about it because of the environmental impact. I would be pretty much unable to do a thing though if I didn't have it on a lot this summer.

When do the kids return to school? Hoping your bounce returns even before then.

The journal article is finished, awaiting publication in about a week. To answer your earlier question too, I'm feeling great about how inspired and productive I am at the moment (perhaps too great), even if it's exhausting me. I know it won't last forever, but it's a great start to my creative year.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

The heat wave has been quite amazing @Mazarita. We have been lucky here as we have a breeze that has kept temps to relatively OK with the occasional big temp, though it is very much summer here too! It's been very humid at times which few people here cope with! Not far away (half an hour drive) the temps have been surprisingly different often as the breeze hasn't reached that far. Where we sometimes stay has been very hot too.

I'm glad you have your air conditioner, even though it doesn't feel great to use in a way. The idea of not being able to do much if you didn't use it makes it very worth using!

Awesome to hear you made the deadline for your article and that you're still feeling great about it all. The 'maybe too great' could feel maybe a bit tricky at times. I feel for you with the need you have to watch the ups as well as the downs like you do. You sound so on to it while being able to ride along with it though. Maybe that's a kind of balance you can feel proud of 😊

Kids are back in just under two weeks. Some xmas holidays and any holidays really, have been a struggle for me with the constant of them but this one has been OK in that way so far, despite the ugh-ness I've had at times. I won't be too sad when they return to school though!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, I think one of the keys to making the deadline for the article, is that there was no deadline. I approached the journal editor about it a couple of months ago. If it didn't happen at all, it wouldn't have been a big deal to him. He's a cool guy, a friend over the net.

I do have a deadline on my major video-making project at the moment though. Fortunately I am running weeks ahead of the closing date. I planned it that way so I didn't fall into the overwhelm and following depression I felt about the 'failed' project at the end of last year.

You might be amazed at the long list of projects I have going at the moment! I'm juggling a few at once, and I have others mapped out for months ahead!

Thanks for thinking I might have some balance in finding a way to ride the ups and downs, while being aware of them. It's hard for me to think there's much balance in my life while in this time of manic creative energy and so little sleep. But it's true that there is some centred point inside me that is keeping me sane. I've never seemed very insane to most people, even when I kind of was! It's something that mostly goes on inside me, though my GP did say I was talking faster than usual last week. The outward manifestations are rarely all that obvious though, as far as I'm aware.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Goodness who is looking at the pants!!!!!!!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita@CheerBear Morning ladies. So good to see you here Mazzy 😄

Good morning also to @eth@TAB@Adge@outlander@Exoplanet wishing everyone a fabulous day 🙂 xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That's great that you're on to the deadline project @Mazarita. I had a little concern (not the best word - more a caring kind of thing) that you wouldn't enjoy (or worse) going off on such creative adventures if the pressure of deadlines became intense. You're pretty on to this stuff though and have that power of awareness that seems to carry you through well in many ways.

Again wishing I could see your projects and hear more about what you have on! I enjoy and appreciate the parts we do get to share with you though.

I can very much relate to the internal aspect of what goes on for you. I have a lot more tricky than I would appear to have from the outside. The front I can put on is handy in lots of ways but it also means I can feel on my own with my struggles too. It makes me wonder sometimes/often how much more there is to people, even people close to us, than we get to see!

Morning @Bunniekins 🙂
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