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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sounds great @Zoe7 and happy that you are getting family support to sort things and do the roof. I'm ok today, heading back to bed shortly. Have separated the dogs for a while for some peace and quiet.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes I am lucky to have that help from the family. It is a big job so it is much needed help @eth

My little fluffball is curled up on the pillow on the couch - hope your brother's dogs are okay now that you have separated them. Are your brother and SIL back today or tomorrow?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth My dentist said I should not have Fisherman's friends ever again - the main cause of my tooth decay.

Suar free mints is what I've been having instead, too.

Adge

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Zoe7 I hope you have a good day too.

And every one else too.

I didn't sleep well last night at all - just short periods (not solid).

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It must have been the night for it @Adge A few of us didn't sleep well last night. Hope you are okay today and tonight is better for you. Do you have anything planned for today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth @Adge @Zoe7 @CheerBear

Yes the cool change has arrived and it is very pleasant. I spent a lot of time in the garden yesterday.

I have some ladies over for singing today.

Son is going to gf. They are still working through their "separation".

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Cool here too today @Appleblossom and grateful for tht with everything that I need to do.

Hope you enjoy your singing with the ladies coming over

Better get back to the work now I have had a rest - lots to do before my sister and her partner get here to help.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi again @Adge @Appleblossom @Zoe7 @CheerBear and to you too @Mazarita .

@Adge bro and sil said they'd be back later today. Sil has to go back to work tomorrow so they're unlikely to stay an extra night.

@Zoe7 All was good once I separated the dogs. One is a border collie and can get over-enthusiastic rounding up the other, a staffie x. Staffie is a lot smaller but seemed to be giving it back to bc this morning in no uncertain terms. They are both gentle boys most of the time, but dogs are dogs!

Hope the garage job is coming along nicely.

@Appleblossom hope you're enjoying your singing.

@CheerBear hope you're getting the gentle day you need.

@Mazarita hope you're resting as much as possible between video bursts. Looking forward to catching up with you some time soon.

I've dozed on and off all morning - took a prn very early as I wanted to have a good sleep in while the others are away, and it worked better than it sometimes does. Feeling quite relaxed still. Not sure what I'll do today, maybe watch some more eps of Harrow on iview which I started yesterday. The cool change is marvellous. Amazing how different the weather can be from one day to the next. Uncle cancelled his visit so there's no pressure to do the domestics I would have done before he arrived.

Just had a yummy croissant with plum jam and fig yoghurt - so good. Heading for the coffee pot now.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I watched Harrow when it was on @eth and enjoy it - not the best AUstralian series ever but worth watching for some light entertainment - despite the premise of the show. I like most shows about crime/police etc. but don't tend to watch much these days.

I'm glad it was all good when you separated the dogs - even the best behaved dogs can get annoyed with each ofther at times - just like humans can too

The garage job is happening slowly - don't expect my sister and her partner for about another hour so have a little time before they get here. I have done the majority of what needed moving and they can help with what remains - much easier with a few more hands.

Going to get myself some lunch and wait for them now.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I mostly watch crime dramas @Zoe7. My adult child used to ask me how I could watch Law and Order SVU given my history but for some reason it didn't cause me a problem.

Good luck with the big job today - hope they turn up soon and the weather stays dry so you can get it finished.

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