FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

16,051 - 16,060 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hope you sleep well @eth. Nice to catch you this morning ❤

Definitely some ❤ to you too @Appleblossom.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you both for company in the wee hours.

@CheerBear @eth

Beaming warm feelings back atcha

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It was a nice surprise to see you in the early hours today @Appleblossom, as I don't often bump into you in the small ones 😊

Hope today is right enough for you, whatever it is you decide to do. I have a feeling you do gently with yourself well, though I understand this might be something that you're learning and practicing. Wishes for a gentle kind of day for you, especially with what sounds a little like fragile feelings happening at the moment.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you @CheerBear

I had been very manic and suicidal last night. It is a new learning not to push myself to the nth degree to do what needs doing.

My co-ordinator emailed me that it was fine that I stayed home. I am in credit with her.

Peace

@Mazarita

For YOU Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello Everyone 🙂

@Mazarita Thank you for the letter/post just for me 😄 & CONGRATULATIONS on giving up the herb 🙂 I don't think it's a bad thing myself, but I've also been there, the all day every day - it's a terrible drain on finances & it really clouds the thoughts, not the best when you've got a brain that's already struggling to process the information it's receiving.

I've just finished mowing the yard! 😄 Though I could see that the grass I had already mowed - has started growing already . . . in just 2 days!!!

I'm glad your enjoying your video projects, that feeling of enjoying a purpose in life . . . I think that's what life's all about 🙂 But I'm also glad you could see a slightly spiralling pattern, it doesn't surprise me that you could - that's the wisdom of years of spiralling 😉

I'm about to take the puppies for their walk, in my head I tell myself 'I've got 10 000 reasons that makes a million sense {think cents} to me, to walk around my beautiful new fence' 😄 I took them into the local forest on xmas eve, the staffy did his norm & took off, only this time he was gone for almost an hour. I have decided that we will only have on-lead walks in there now, he has 20 acres of private forest to run off-lead!

I want to start thinking about camping again, I have told my Daughter I will visit on her birthday which is in early Feburary. I'm thinking about going to the private camp ground that I was going to go to last xmas, it sounded like a nice spot, on the banks of a river; & the school holidays will be over, so I'm hoping in might not be too crowded.

I still find myself getting lost on my digitally deserted island most of the time, I tend to think time spent enjoying is not time wasted. I also still manage to make the bed & do the dishes each day too, & with the hot weather I'm having a daily bath & I'm still brushing my teeth each night 🙂 I had a bit of a break-down after last xmas, it's taken to this xmas to get over it. I am glad I chose not to face the dramas & stayed home & had a peaceful, quiet one.

Well, I have a staffy poking his nuzzling my arm, . . . if I don't get up & start walking with him, his tongue will start licking said arm {ICKY}, so I'll finish off here.

Love you Mazy

Love to all that need or want it

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Congrats on new place ? @Exoplanet Glad all going well 😸

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Mazarita. It has been humid and hot here but I am sitting in my coffee spot feeling a change come through. Thinking of you this morning hoping the last couple of days have had good moments for you.

❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @CheerBear, I wonder if you are still around. A sudden video project came up and I have had an insanely busy time with it over the past couple of days and have been unable to come to the forum at all. Would be great to connect this morning but, if not, I wish you a wonderful day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning all @Mazarita @CheerBear @Appleblossom @Exoplanet @TAB @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @outlander @Bunniekins @PeppiPatty @Teej @Sophia1 and all the other regulars here.

I'm going to the farm today until Tuesday and need to do a bit of cooking before then so this is my only chance to catch up if anyone's here at the moment. Am going to make a leek tart and a batch of pesto to take up with us.

If I don't catch up with any of you I hope the next few days are good to you all and that waking on New Years Day has you feeling reconciled with 2018 and ready for a 2019 that has joy and dreams coming true in it.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Mazarita! So happy to hear from you 😊 How are you feeling with your new project? Is it OK for you that you've been so busy with it?

Hiya @eth. Hope your morning getting ready for the farm goes well and that you enjoy your time away.
16,051 - 16,060 of 27,230