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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Haha @CheerBear goodluck with the little cactus then.
Thanks CB hoping you have a good day ❤😘

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander what a nice good morning message :). I will do the same. Wishing everyone @Mazarita@CheerBear@CheerBear@eth and all a kind and calm Monday as we are getting closer to the madness of Christmas. Love greenpea.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins :face_with_rolling_eyes:❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Lovely message from you also @Bunniekins thanks. Hoping your Monday is one with lots of good in it 💚

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita @CheerBear @outlander @Bunniekins @TAB @Appleblossom and anyone else floating around here today. Lovely to see this morning's greetings and positivity.

Having another quiet home day here. Still haven't done my admin jobs so they're on today's agenda. Not much else. Cool and overcast here this morning so thinking there might be some rain for the garden.

@TAB sorry I'm not sure what your message was referring to - is 'christmas thingy' what you refer to this time of year as? Sorry to hear something has you having teary moments. Here to support if you feel like telling me what it's about.

@Appleblossom thanks for getting it when I referred to the kidults' controlling behaviour. Because they aren't communicating clearly or timely it's starting to look like there won't be enough time to have gifts delivered before the big day. I think I'll just go ahead and choose some safe enough things today online. What they always prefer is me just giving them $$ but I'm not going to do that any more. Always ends up getting used for something else anyway. Sheeesh first world problems!

@outlander I hope what ever the big thing you have on today works out well for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @eth, @outlander, @Bunniekins and all. Just heading back to bed now but wanted to say hi and have a good day to all. Thinking of you with your appointment today, @outlander. Hope it goes very well. Later, all.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth it was some songs that listened to the other day that can set me off and they did. Was just feeling sorry for myself. Felt better afterwards tho. Just meant being alone, relatives expectations etc re xmas. Its ok. Thanks for asking

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth

@Mazarita

@CheerBear

@outlander

@TAB

@Bunniekins

Have a good day ALL.

I have a joint appointment with my son.

Feeling short on words, but alright.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hope it goes okay @Appleblossom

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @TAB

but it did not. He changed his mind and wanted a single, which was fine but still drove him there. We will have a double on Wednesday.

But in car I am not really allowed to talk to him, just chauffeur him, and I made the mistake of saying he should have brought his diary, when he got a call for work and did not know his schedule. He told me off for being emotional?? Che?? quietly business like would be more accurate. So by time saw counsellor things were terse and I said "we still dont have any strategies" to counsellor and made a few appointments ahead of time. Son had already said he would make his own way home. I have to take cat to vet later.

Thanks for listening.

These people were supposed to see him a year ago, but we had to wait til a lot of things settled, then the guy we were given only lasted 3 months and got the sack, so started with a new guy, who seems good, but does not have whole picture yet. All I can do is hope and take next step.

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