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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Faith-and-Hope and I hope you are well at the moment. No I don't access the forums from my phone either - have never even tried. I just use my laptop when I'm at home.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yay for your good news @CheerBear

Good morning everyone who's around and sending warm wishes for a peaceful and productive one - I have a day at home today and will be here for chats if anyone else is.

Planning to have a practice run at making pumpkin seeded bread today in the hope it turns out well so I can do it again for Christmas. Haven't made bread or used yeast in anything for many many years.

Catching the bus with my support worker yesterday went well. It's quite a milestone for me.

Then had a pretty in depth session with my psychologist identifying together some definite patterns in the partnership relationships I've had and the 'schema' underlying them. I didn't know what that meant so : "A schema is a cognitive framework or concept that helps organize and interpret information. ... Schemas can contribute to stereotypes and make it difficult to retain new information that does not conform to our established ideas about the world." e.g. what we learn as children from our parents' relationship/s can mould what we then play out in our relationships as adults. I told her I'd probably forget a lot of what we spoke of and she said 'that's ok, there's 2 of us here now and I'll remind you if you need me to'. Yet again came away thinking this woman is really good and I totally trust her. She said schema work and EMDR work well together for trauma recovery (cPTSD). The whole discussion started with me showing her a poem I've started that describes different triggers and my response to them, going through different events in my history. She said my descriptions of the actual effects of cPTSD were really beautifully written. I'll hang on to that and will add to the poem as things come up.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

So pleased the session with your psych went well @eth and that you tackled the bus situation as well. It is good that you showed your psych the poem - it seems that is was great to get it out and also to share it all - so well done for that also.

@CheerBear such good news about the engagement - that is the kind of news thst helps to lift us CB - even just little despite everything else going on for you. Been thinking bout you a lot the lst couple of days.

Hi also @Mazarita @Exoplanet and all who visit this thread

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Zoe7 How's your day going so far? Do you have any plans?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I am taking some time to get moving this morning but planning on going to the pool in a couple of hours @eth Learn to swim finishes at 12pm so the pool is free for other users then so that is the time I go. This afternoon will be mostly for planning for tomorrow. I have most of it organised in my mind but need to print a few things out and formalise it all to email to the Principal.

Do you have any plans for today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 I hope you get what you want done. I'm going to have a go at bread making for the first time in probably decades. If it works out we can take it to the farm on the weekend. Escaping from a really noisy event that takes over our city for 3 days. Leaving early Saturday after a great (I hope) music gig on Friday night.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I hope your bread making turns out well @eth I can understand you wanting to get out of the noise nd escape to the country for a few days. I am lucky that it is relatively quiet where I live. There is some through trsffic but it is s smll street so cars have to be quite careful and most come down the street slowly.

If I get all my planning done early then Toby will get a haircut today as well then I can vacuum which will help with the house feeling a bit cleaner.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 we live 3 suburbs away but can still hear the cars racing.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That would be so annoying @eth so glad you are taking a break from it all - sounds like a really great idea to keep the stress down

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth ....

I am a tech dinosaur too ..... I have worked things out slowly with help from other forumites and my baby dragons. Keep asking, and others more knowledgeable that me will be able to answer you, I am sure .....

You can use your phone recharge cord to link your phone to your computer and there are prompts to follow to download the images from phone to PC, but it is something you might want someone to sit with you for, and walk through it.

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