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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Shaz51

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

ohhh I forgot Jack the cat @Mazarita

hello @Zoe7 hugs my sister

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hugs back @Shaz51 Hope you have had a restful day my sister

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @CheerBear, and anyone who might be awake this early morning.

Just leaving this note to see if anyone is around for chat. Will respond to messages from yesterday later. Hope today starts with some fresh feelings for all.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita and all.

Hoping your yesterday was good for you, however you ended up spending it. We went to the beach yesterday and I went on a walk and spent some time looking in the rockpools. I thought of you and your beach walks, and how good they can feel. We found and held a little crab too, which the kids thought was pretty cool 🙂

I've woken up not feeling so great this morning. I think it's going to be one of those off days for me, where lots feels like a bit too much. I'm about to get the kids up and ready to start the week but wanted to say a hi back before I do.

Hope you slept OK and that the morning starts well for you ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Your yesterday sounds lovely, @CheerBear. Walking around rockpools and seeing what's in there sounds calming. A little piece of wonderment for you and the kids, when finding and holding the crab, a lovely detail of the day. A great way of relaxing and centering yourself with nature, before starting a difficult week. I hope the day ahead has better feelings for you than anticipated on waking, and that forward progress is made.

Yesterday here was a good one for me, aside from aching in joints and muscles all over, which might have been some kind of hangover of the big day out on Saturday, though I'm feeling it still. Nonetheless, I spent hours editing the video we shot with our friend, and have been doing more editing overnight. Still a way to go yet before it's anywhere near satisfying, but glad to be making slow progress overall.

I'm hoping to keep the slow approach to this one. In the past I have often made them so fast, in a frenzy of late night inspiration. Hoping to integrate this one a bit more into gentler and healthier rhythms of body, so I'm not so prone to anxiety in the process. As much as I love doing it, I get anxious and easily stressed about potential creative failure, on every video I make.

C watched shows on TV with headphones on all day. The TV is just a few feet from my desk, so I appreciated that, as it can be hard to focus on what I'm doing on the computer with the TV blaring right next to me, as it often is. Consequently, the whole day felt quieter and more serene, and I enjoyed his company even more.

Aside from the editing, I skimmed the 60 pieces of writing I needed to read before later this week, for the other project I mentioned yesterday. I found I could tell a short way into each piece if I was going to relate and be able to work with the writing and author, so made fast work of a big task. Gave close attention to the ones I was drawn to and completed the job of selecting three favourites, and submitted my choices to the producers, five days before the deadline for that.

Also did a few small self care things, including making myself tuna and mayo sandwich for lunch, and taking regular breaks from the computer to wind down in between bursts of activity. Have been good with my physio exercises twice a day lately, and did them yesterday too. Manged to fit in a few minor domestic jobs too, like making the bed and keeping our small flat tidy over the day, especially the tiny kitchen which gets messy very fast. It was enough to feel like I wasn't just living in my creative head all day.

It was an indoors day completely, except for times out in the courtyard for smokes, looking at trees, plants and sky, and listening to birds. C and I smiling and brief chatting, and kind of playing with each other in silly ways, as we often do.

Then it was time for bed at about 11.30pm. I knew I needed to go because I was falling asleep playing spider solitaire on my mobile, while relaxing in my armchair. Didn't feel at all like doing that last chore of the day - cleaning my teeth thoroughly - but I did it anyway and felt good for it. I'm mostly still keeping up my slightly manic dental hygiene regime, since I had the twelve fillings some months ago. I use floss and little dental brushes, and fluoride toothpaste. I used to prefer herbal, but it wasn't protecting my teeth enough. So have taken the dentist's advice and gone mainstream commercial with it now.

Since then I've had only a few hours sleep, but will go back for more after writing this.

Today is another quiet day and I may or may not leave the flat again. Feels good to be back into the creative stuff in a fuller way again, and would like to extend the enjoyment of that yesterday, into today. Hoping I might do a few slightly more demanding domestic jobs today too, like give my bathroom a spruce up and maybe sweep the courtyard. If I was really good I would change my sheets too. We'll see how good I am when it comes to it.

Your mention of yesterday's beach visit, @CheerBear, has reminded me I want to get out for my first walk in a long time, now that physio has given permission for me to do it once a week. Planning for that in coming days. Waiting for low tide to be late enough for me to do it, and me awake enough when that happens, as I only walk at low tide to minimise pain in legs and feet.

Good morning, @Zoe7, @eth, @Bunniekins, @Appleblossom, @Shaz51, @Exoplanet and all. Even though I am not posting much after dawn just at the moment, it's great reading your posts and conversations throughout the day. Sending love and wishes for a day that treats you kindly. Maybe we might catch up for live chat if the timing is right, sometime over the day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Loved reading about your day yesterday @Mazarita. I could feel the sense of slower pace and gentleness in the way you described it. Really cool to read that you managed to get what you did done with the pieces of writing. Again imagination wanting to run wild thinking what they might actually be. That quiet company, with brief chatting and smiles you shared with C is the kind of company I enjoy a lot.

I hope your day has more of that enjoyment and calm, and that you get what feels right to do, done.

I'm off to an appointment with and for muddled middle today. It takes very little to set them off and I think these appointments will present some challenges along the way, though I am surprised and impressed with them agreeing to actually go. After that I need to spend time reviewing my NDIS stuff ready for tomorrow's meeting. I dont feel at all prepared but I think that is more that we really don't know what to expect beyond a vague idea of what happens, rather than a lack of preparation from my side. Looking forward to it being over.

Hugs and ❤ for all.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Loved reading about your day yesterday @Mazarita

Hello @CheerBear, @Appleblossom, @eth

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita You had such a big day yesterday - so much packed into one day. Like others here I love resding about your day - it gives me inspiration to try to do more

@CheerBear Loved also reading bout your beach and rockpool experience with LF - there is something so wonderful about nature and the balance one can feel about being immersed in it. Goodluck with middle and the appointment

@Shaz51 @Appleblossom @eth goodmorning all - hope you all have a good day today

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

👋 @Shaz51 ❤

Thanks @Zoe7. The beach was great yesterday 🙂 Do you have work today? Hope it's a good one for you ❤
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