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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi from me too @outlander hope today is unfurling smoothly for you.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Keeping everything crossed that you can get some better sleep with the change of med dose, @eth. 20 minute sleeps overnight sounds pretty awful. The lowest I seem to go is about an hour at the moment, up to about three hours on the better end of the sleep chunks.

I think I may have quite significant sleep apnea, which might be contributing to this. My friend who stayed here some months ago is convinced I have it quite badly, as I snore extremely loudly, cough in my sleep and seem to be struggling for breath quite often, according to her. I have also been waking lately with very bloodshot eyes, which have been staying pinkish all day. That's new for me. So I'm going to talk to my GP about being referred for sleep studies next time I see her. Having looked it up on the public hospital site, I see there's a six to twelve month wait for sleep studies. Better late than never though.

Good to hear you have at least one day off from activities per week. Makes sense that Thursday is a good day for it after your sessions on Wednesday.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita i the shocking night. I did get your tags this morning but i kept drifting in and out and didn't want to keep you up. I had some really upsetting and disturbing dreams so its kinda set the tone for the day but maybe itll improve.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

good morning @Mazarita@eth@Bunniekins@CheerBear@Appleblossom

Thanks for tags...likes...noticing..

I have had busy days this week....

a library diy workshop about natural products...

I tried to take a photograph using my phone of one of the recipes in a book that was there..one lady came up and loudly said "oh you won't be able to do that look at how much you are shaking"".anxiety has been really high of late due to a couple of triggers...

I felt as though I wanted the floor to swallow me up..I stayed on but could not wait to leave when it finished...

yesterday was another group outing ...an animal park and lunch after...thoroughly enjoyed that...

today am off for another specialist appointment and discussion around another operation...

hoping to get out of the way before christmas...probably not likely...at least should know when hopefully...

Had a long chat with DV helpline last night...lifeline gave me the details....the lady was so very caring and gentle...not pushing me to talk about anything...I stuttered badly and kept blocking...we talked for an hour...she suggested I talk about this with psychotherapist in depth or ask if he feels that I would be better off seeing someone specialised in that area...as I really have not discussed it at great length..

another outing on friday...

all very new for me as isolated myself for so long before...

I feel a bit dissociated again...I think that I kick into this mode as a form of protection..survival...

I hope that all goes well for you all in whatever you are doing...be it catching up on much deserved rest...tackling something new or just being nice to yourself..💜💛💚

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander, hugs for your bad night. No worries about not replying to tags. Better drift than chat probably. I stayed up for about two and a half hours chatting with CB anyway. We had a good rave. Sometimes I kind of just let my disturbing dreams drop back where they came from if possible. I used to actively try to remember my dreams, but these days I think it's better not to keep bringing them into my mind, even if they were okay. I hope the mood of the day does improve for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Sophia1 ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Getting checked out for sleep apnoea sounds like a good move @Mazarita It does sound like that may be what's happening (at least partly). I had a sleep study done once - they put loads of electrodes on my skull and some on points on my body as well, and this made it harder to sleep than usual! Plus they would wake me up to check none of the electrodes had fallen off. I really don't know how they could get an acurate reading with all that going on. Plus the nurse who managed me overnight said to me in the morning 'your problem's all in your head' - I put in a complaint about her and heard later that she was sacked.

Hopefully it's changed in the several years since mine was done. And if you do find out you are having apnoeas that they can give you a solution - like maybe a cpap machine.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Sophia1, sorry to hear you may need another operation. Sounds like it might not be as serious as the recent one? Hope you can get it out of the way sooner rather than later.

Great to hear that you are having some outings, even despite awkward and insensitive people around sometimes.

Hugs for the DV issues arising. I'm guessing it's from past trauma? Kindest wishes for you to be able to work them through and find release.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks Mazzy
I try not to let them overtake the day but because its related to one of my traumas it makes me so much more easy to trigger so itll be abit more self care and avoiding threads i know could be triggering so i wont look at new threads today either like i normally do.
I mustve had a bad one in there somewhere as i bit my tounge and made it bleed cause of my broken tooth.

Ive got mostly cleaning up to do and i need to exchange a dvd as i ordered it brand new but its already scratches before i even got to watch it so they said bring it back.

Ive forgotten if inread if you had plans today? @Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you @eth
I hope your feeling a little better after Tuesday. Ive had a painful one of those too. Not nice at all.

Do you have any plans today? Hows your garden going?
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