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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Well done on keeping at your goals @eth very well done. Im quite independent but the thoughy of going on public transport alone makes me anxious ( even going with others makes me nervous) your being very brave 😘

A day in the garden sounds lovely. Im not much of a green thumb myself but have a little plant-think they are marigolds someone said. But i like to admire others gardens. Do you have many plants in yours?

Well done on having that convo with bro too it mustve been very difficult but i hope it helps in the long run too.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good to see you, even if briefly, @Bunniekins. Enjoy your walk! And also your freer day while son 2 is with his dad.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins have a nice walk and enjoy your 'day off' xx

@Mazarita I don't use the vape much at all as it doesn't satisfy my urge to smoke at all. But yesterday ordered some juices with nicotine in them from NZ (only a few mg) and am hoping that makes it more satisfying. With the nic-free juice in it now it just makes me crave a real ciggie. Very much hoping I don't have the hypomanic response to the new ones when I have them like I did with nicotine patches when I tried them a few years ago.

Had one of my chaos dreams early this morning and still feeling fairly unsettled from it. It also included a woman standing over me and threatening my, not being able to find my own phone number, and almost missing a plane (woke up before that was resolved). Sheeesh the things our minds can create.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Bunniekins 💚
Nice to see you this morning. Enjoy your walk!

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Im glad your going better @Mazarita i fo remember you having quite a few challanges earlier on.
Yes your right smaller flats can be easy to clean but twice as easy to get messy. Everything seems to have its place and if its not then it alreadg starts to look messy. Well done to you both for making that extra effort.
Fingers crossed youll be able to see tour friend today too.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, when I used patches, I found myself just smoking the same amount as well. It might be that you have ordered your vape juice from the same place I found in New Zealand. I enjoyed using it except for the cough, especially liked the taste, much better than tobacco! Good luck with it.

Any plans for today?

@outlander, thanks for remembering what a difficult year it's been for me with my health.

What are you up to today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm happy to see how much better you're doing now too @Mazarita. Hope you are getting some decent sleeps too.

@outlander We have a lot in our garden, mostly edible. Bro and sil own 2 houses next door to each other and the veg garden is the back 1/2 of the block next door. We have 14 raised garden beds with herbs, vegies, fruit trees around the perimeter, a large passionfruit vine across the back wall and some new seedlings just planted. All up at least 30 different plants. And currently we're in the process of relocating the beds to the back of the block (big job) in preparation for a swimming pool they had hoped to have before Christmas but now looks like it will be later than that.

The only problem with days when every one is in the garden is that I can't smoke! It's good for me, but my cravings get really strong at times.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

No definite plans for today yet @Mazarita. But really should try to talk to M about cat sometime soon.

Bro and sil are out in the veg garden already so they might get me involved in whatever chores they have planned.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Weve had many midnight convos during that time @Mazarita so even during your difficult time you helped with mine too which i very much appreciate ❤

This morning idont have much planned. Maybe abit more housework and washing and then this arvo my cousins bringing her little one down to meet the horses ao ill be there and feeding as well. Other than that probably juat abit of research for both pop and my studies. Ive got 2 assessments and then ive completed the course.

@eth wow! What a garden! How lovely and resourceful too. It really sounds amazing and with a pool being installed too would make it even better.
I hope with busy hands and minds the urge to smoke stays low and manageable for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, I'm still waking up about every two hours over night. Will be going to bed a bit later this morning to get another chunk. I am finding I can go on less sleep at the moment, but I do get tired if I sit in the armchair, and often fall asleep there without realising it, have a micronap and wake myself up with a little jolt. Quite funny really, but I usually take times like those in the day as a cue to get a nap if I can. Overall, I think I'm getting enough sleep, just in a rather fragmented way. I know you have had a similar problem for a long time.

Not being able to smoke while you are all out in the garden sounds pretty tough, even though it might be good to be getting longer breaks without one from time to time.

As always, your garden sounds magnificent. Yum, passionfruit.

If you are anything like me, the longer you leave talking to sil's mother, the harder it may be. Hope you do manage to do that soon, so that it's out of the way.

@outlander, it makes me smile that you feel I've helped you too.

Sounds like a pretty productive day you have planned, hopefully with some cruisy times for you in it as well. Awesome that you will have completed the course after only two more assignments!

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