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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Lovely to see you in 'real time' this morning, @Exoplanet. Much love and good wishes for whatever you do today.

Thanks, @eth. So good to catch you in real time for a little today anyway. Love to you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yay @Mazarita Lovely to see you too 🙂 I'm heading off the forum now, so you can just sit there & do nothing . . . right? 😉

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Exoplanet, no, I won't sit here and do nothing today. It might be safe to say that the next step is getting out the rubber ducky! Hope that little duck is treating you well lately too.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

morning everyone

thanks for the tags @eth@Mazarita@Exoplanet@Shaz51@Bunniekins the past few days, im sorry if ive missed anything. i havent been online.

morning to everyone here too @MoonGal@PeppiPatty (look after yourself, im sorry Mr isnt doing so well atm) @Appleblossom @Faith-and-Hope and all

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth thanks for the tag 😀

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi again everyone 🙂 Lovely to read all the chatter.

@Mazarita you asked about my feelings re volunteering after yesterdays appointment with my MH worker. I was pretty surprised as she came over with a bunch of different things she wanted me to think about (lots of volunteering stuff) including a paid position 'just for consideration'. Its an amazing job in trauma and peer work that I have the right qualifications for, but there's no chance I could right now. It was a bit overwhelming and I feel like she doesn't quite get that I dont think/am not in much of a position to be doing that stuff right now. Throughout our appointment I kept thinking how it wasn't helpful to be working with her and how I might ask for out, but right at the end she asked where I wanted to go with our work together. I was able to get it across that I feel like I'm much better off working at things like improving my overall health and wellbeing (physical health, mental health, social connections and engagement, routine etc.) now, and then looking more into study leading to work. Possibly volunteering fits in to the overall wellbeing thing, but there are other things first. We've decided next appointment we'll look at making some goals which may be useful. As is similar to your experience, this can feel a bit pushy sometimes and I kind of miss my old worker at the moment, but I'll keep working at this at least for now. (Long answer sorry, but thanks for asking 🙂).

Sorry to hear you had a crash day yesterday but great to hear you're going to keep on keeping on today (as you do well). Hope whatever is on for you it feels good 🙂

Hope your appointment goes well today @eth. Interested in hearing how you get on with EMDR as you go.

@Shaz51 hugs for you with your mum and Mr Shaz ❤

Thanks for your message @Exoplanet also. Hope you and the fur friends enjoy your day. Shame about the conditions you face with the weather and your gardening attempts. Mid summer here is a bit tricky and everything can crisp quickly, but from now until then we're pretty lucky.

👋 to everyone who I won't tag or this will be an even longer post than it already is!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sounds wise @CheerBear redecision Ive gone the other way many times before .. and crashed and burned

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

fun and games this morning @Exoplanet, @Mazarita, @CheerBear, @TAB, @outlander, @Teej, @Sans911, @saturnzoon, @eth, @PeppiPatty, @MoonGal, @Faith-and-Hope

home now having lunch , mum still in hospital , have to see what happens this afternoon

amm me feeling yuk -- well they have done lots of blood tests and other tests , so will find out later

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hugs @Shaz51
i hope they find out whats wrong with you and your mum too. seems your both in the wars huh

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @TAB. I have a tendency to push myself until I crash and burn. I dont want to and don't think I really need to do that so much right now.

Big hugs @Shaz51. Are you able to put your feet up and/or do something nice for yourself this afternoon?
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