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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It can be tricky @Mazarita but for me it's a matter of working out the right combo of antihistamines and then I'm fine. The gardens really are stunning at this time of the year here and that's the good side to it I think 🙂

Glad that you're sleeping well even if it is in short bursts. Waking every couple of hours would be frustrating I imagine.

Have you got any plans or hopes for your day?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Lately I've again been taking an old-style antihistamine that helps me with sleep, @CheerBear. I wonder if it would work that way for you too. It was recommended by my psychiatrist as an alternative to regular sleep meds, which are all mostly addictive. It's available over the counter at the chemist. Wish I could tell you the name, but not allowed. It's also helping with itchiness that I've been getting from one of the new meds.

I don't really mind the waking up in the night, as long as the sleep I get is good. I think a whole sleep cycle is only 90 minutes, so it seems I'm mostly not missing out on quality sleep at the moment.

Today I want to return to a women's group I used to go to. It's on fairly early in the morning (by my standards), which is partly why I haven't been for a long time. But this morning I want to make the effort to get out.

What's happening for you today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I have looked in to an antihistamine for sleep @Mazarita but can't remember why I didn't try. I'll ask my GP again though as I have heard it helps a few people. I've started a new med (mood stabiliser) and so far I am tolerating it well. It's only been a few days but usually by now I'd be feeling pretty unwell with meds so I feel a bit of hope that this might work. I'm also really keen on doing this one properly which in itself feels good. Crossing fingers.

That would be great to return to group. You've been doing a bit more over the last little while- it's great to see! Is the craft group you went to last week (Friday I think?) a weekly one too? Hope you enjoy it if you get there today.

I have a few little jobs today. There are some bills and a couple of odd bits and pieces I need to pick up around the place. The kids have a school thing on this evening also which we'll go to. Should be a fairly chill but but not too quiet day 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

A chill day, but not too quiet, sounds good, @CheerBear. I know what you mean by that too. Since I haven't been doing much in the way of video making, I find myself at a loss some days to fill my time. That tempts me to just sleep. So yes lately I have been making the effort to get out to activities more. Craft group is weekly, as is art, and women's group. So hoping I can get into the habit of going every week. Mainly good for some social contact and getting out of the flat.

Wishing you the very best with the mood stabiliser. Very glad to hear it isn't knocking you around with side effects.

The sky is lightening up here and a small chorus of birds has started up now. Lovely sounds. I'll head back to bed now with that music in my ears.

Soooo good to catch you again in the morning. Best for your day!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It's brightened my morning to bump in to you this morning @Mazarita 🙂 Off to a good start today.

Hope you enjoy the sounds of the morning as you head back to bed and that the day ahead has lots of good moments for you ❤👋

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi everyone,

@saturnzoon, I too am often tempted to stay in pjs all day, and sometimes do. But I have found that simply getting dressed can help with my depression. Add to that, making the bed, and this often leads on to other helpful activities that lift me little by little out of down states. I also have social anxiety, which you have mentioned experiencing too. When I am at my worst with this, I try if I'm able to make a small step forward simply by going out and checking the mail. I find that any other gentle movements out of the flat expand my range of possibilities for engaging with the world in an ongoing way. These things can be done with or without support workers or NDIS. There is added satisfaction, I find, in being able to initiate our own recovery by doing small things to improve our state of mind and raise our level of satisfaction with life. Hoping these might be useful thoughts in relation to our shared troubles. Wishing you well in your journey of recovery.

@Shaz51, glad you got a little bit of extra sleep on Saturday, though 8am is not a sleep-in by my standards! Wondering how your mum is and how your day goes today.

@Bunniekins, thanks for saying such a lovely thing about love and care. You are very loved on the forum too, my friend, and very much missed at those times you sometimes need a break. Your lively spirit lifts those of many of us here.

@Former-Member, nice to see you here. Sending good wishes for your day.

@Appleblossom, today may be one of your days off from the forum, but saying hi anyway for when you next get on board. Sounds good that you are getting other things done on the computer while taking a bit less time here.

@PeppiPatty, thanks for your thoughts. I am hoping to get in another walk today, on the beach to the local village shops to do some errands and perhaps check out some op shops. What have you been up to since you decided to put off your study? Any art or poetry?

@eth, wondering how yesterday went for you and what you might be up to today. Love your way.

@Exoplanet, wondering how the time at home feels after your great trip away. I'm guessing the fencing you were doing yourself is finished now? I wouldn't mind getting a little housework done today too. I have made the bed. Aside from that, we'll see how I go.

@Faith-and-Hope, @Teej, everyone, sending kind wishes for a rewarding day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita@CheerBear@Faith-and-Hope@Former-Member@Shaz51@eth@outlander and all of the formites wishing everyone a faulous afternoon. Sun is shining, beautiful blue sky .... simply a stunning day. Enjoy xxxxx:)

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Bunniekins 🙂 Great to hear it's such a nice day where you are! Its warm (for us) here today but overcast. I'm outside at the moment enjoying it and looking forward to mid 20's temp tomorrow - haven't seen that here for a while!

Hope everyone is going along OK or better today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita @Bunniekins @CheerBear and anyone else around this afternoon. I haven't caught up on the last few pages yet but will do so shortly.

@Mazarita Love back atcha Yesterday with the new support worker ('care worker' she calls herself) went really well. 3 hours contact time. We went down to the wharf and caught a ferry to the other side of the harbour, walked to a cafe and got a coffee and took it to a park where we chatted for a while, then caught the ferry back. She's really nice and gave me the impression she will really help me work towards goals, unlike the one from PHaMs over the last 6 months (tho I will still have her occasionally when the regular ones aren't available). Plus we had a nice connection about growing up sailing. It was great to get out on the water but it did trigger some strong memories from 9 years ago that I wasn't prepared for. I managed not to talk about that until we were in the park, didn't have a full flashback experience. She was really reassuring.

Then today another significant event - I gave sil's mum an hour massage which I felt really good about and she's told me this afternoon that her pain has diminished so mission accomplished. I was a lot more confident today than when I did my bro a few months ago. I think re-reading my massage manual before I went made a big difference, especially the chapter on massaging the elderly. Stuff I knew but it was good to have a refresher.

Looking forward to catching up with everyone.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello @Mazarita, @Bunniekins, My sleeping has changed a little bit and today i have had a headache all day '

wondering if I am stressed by everything that is going on a the moment

mum is improving and i know she is feeling better because she is giving me lots of orders but she will end up back in hospital again like in 8 weeks time or less

she gets very well looked after in hospital but there is so much to do and with mr shaz everyday ups and downs and with my physical problems

sorry my friends

sending you all hugs and hoping you are all ok xxxxx @CheerBear, @eth, @Bunniekins, @Mazarita, @Exoplanet, @Snowie, @Sans911

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