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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sounds like a good plan, @The-red-centaur. Hope the hard feelings subside and sleep comes for you soon.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I agree.

@The-red-centaur @Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning everyone.

Wondering if anyone is up and around at this early time? @Mazarita maybe. Kind of hoping for you all that you're sleeping though

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning, @CheerBear

Amazing timing. Just woke up. Back to bed soon but here for now. How has your night been?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

So good to see you @Mazarita. I slept well last night and when I woke there was a c-link email waiting for me. I have been approved for the claim I was making. I am full of feelings right now. It's relief in a huge way but some sadness too or just a heavy or something. Far out.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, that is awesome news that you have been approved. Understand too some mixed thoughts arising out of it. Big hug for it all ways round.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Did you get that when yours went through @Mazarita, the big and mixed feelings? I panicked when I saw the letter. Maybe it's just panic settling. Thank you for understanding and the hugs you always give ❤

How was your sleep last night?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It took me a long time to apply for it, @CheerBear, mainly because I couldn't identify with what it kind of meant. So I struggled through further years and work breakdowns. In retrospect, if I had been given it a long long time ago, my life would have been a lot less extreme and mad. Mostly it was the biggest relief of the universe when it came through. I had to apply twice to get it, took about 18 months all up. It was desperately needed so that made it a pretty glad-making experience in the final count. My life in the years since has been so much more livable than ever before. I'm really happy for you. It seems likely to make life quite a bit easier for you.

I have had about 3 hours sleep overnight.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you for sharing @Mazarita. I am surprised that it happened so quickly and without a hiccup for me. Even my age was against me. I don't know what this says about me though I know it will give me security and stability in a huge way and take massive stress and pressure off. I couldn't have done what I needed to do without it and I really honestly thought that anymore being pushed to would be enough to be the end.

I'm so teary but I think it's strange tears of something actually going well. Something feeling secure again. A stress, an huge stress, taken away. You and others here have helped me with this one in a huge way and I really appreciate it.

Sorry, I'm all weird this morning. I wasn't expecting to see that news just yet.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It doesn't need to be absorbed all at once, @CheerBear. I can imagine how relieved you are. It also gave me a kind of security I never had before in my life. The reduction of stress is why I wish I'd got it at a younger age. I probably should have had it since my 20s really, with the crohns ripping my insides apart and the as-yet-undiagnosed bipolar making everything a thousand times more difficult than it already was. Though I understand your hesitations about it all, I see it as nothing but good news for you.

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