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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

New Post: Re: A long rave

Yay for fluffy 😊

That sounds really good @Mazarita - loving company, walking, getting out and about. Thinking about it makes me think maybe some company, some gardening and some fresh air could be the right choice for me today also.

Hope whatever you decide to do it feels good for you ❤

In response to: New Post: Re: A long rave

New Post: Re: A long rave

Thanks again, lovely @CheerBear

I might go now and see what happens in the way of motivation.

Enjoy whatever you decide to do today!

In response to: New Post: Re: A long rave

Re: New Post: Re: A long rave

Hey @Mazarita and @CheerBear Hoping the morning is unfolding gently for you both, with or without motivation. And that you both get to hang out with your friends later.

I've probably missed you both here.

I too need to hit the shower today!

In response to: Re: New Post: Re: A long rave

Re: New Post: Re: A long rave

May have missed you also now @eth. I've decided it's definitely not a day for putting on a happy face around a friend and instead I am about to try some more crochet (or maybe pull out some pencils) in front of the heater. I noticed you posted how your meeting this morning went and will have a proper read a bit later. I came home to another NDIA letter which has sent me further into feeling miserable. It's such a big mess 😔 I reeeeally have to try to let it go and to keep it in the hands of my MH worker and her team because every time I try to sort it out it leaves me feeling so much worse. I am thinking you might understand that one pretty well.

Hope your afternoon is going along well for you.

In response to: Re: New Post: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, @CheerBear,

Well, I went back to bed again after trying unsuccessfully to find some motivation earlier. Woke about 12.15pm and straight away started sorting out the washing that needs doing (many loads). Undeterred, I've got the whites into the washer for the first load and it is going as I speak. I've changed into 'wash day clothes' too (stuff I almost never wear), which means I have clean clothes on for the first time in days as well. I've been sleeping in the same leggings and singlet for all that time and not changing on waking, just chucking 'Fluffy' over the top to keep me warm. All a major step forward from where I've been.

@eth, glad you are now on the MyGov site and that your meeting went okay. That person better find you some more support workers! As you said, that is what they are being paid for! I like @CheerBear's idea of leaving stuff to the support people as much as possible, so it's not so stressful for you.

@CheerBear, I too have decided to stay home today, at least as long as it takes me to get through some washing. Then I'll try for a shower. Then, I might see if there's time to visit my friend. Even if I don't make it today, it's likely C and I could go over tonight for an after-dinner beverage and chat. That might keep me out of bed later anyway.

May have missed you both, but I know it's nice to exchange messages, even if not in real time.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Still here @Mazarita, trying to push myself to get up out of the ball I am in under my fluffy with my tissues and hiding out on the back step (its a good look 😆). Great to hear that you've taken a step forward today! Love your options for today - you seem so gentle with yourself while still trying to puah through and I really admire that.

I should do some washing also if I'm not having company. Or I'll remember it'll still be there tomorrow (maybe I can drop the 'should' and try for gentle too 😉)

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Ran out of pegs, @CheerBear. Off to my friends place in a moment. Will catch up again later. Washing is good.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oooh you know you've done some washing when you've run out of pegs 😁

Yay for your friend visit also. Sounds like a good day for you! Go you @Mazarita 😊

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi All,

I'm sad but relieved but sad.

I'm pulling out of my University degree.

My priority is Mr Buddha

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I am sad for you too, @PeppiPatty.

But I can imagine a relief from stress too.

Hugs.

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