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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sleep well @Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Faith-and-Hope and @Appleblossom hoping today is going smoothly so far for you both.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth

I am just about to put the computer down and get to work.

Just heard about Lombok's 2nd earthquake in a week ... and before that was Agung in Bali. More loss of life. My thoughts are with them atm.

Take Care

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth.

So far, so good .... ☺️

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I've just gotten back from my little town. I did, a big thing for me. I went into a strange property, I was looking for the fence contractor that had been recommended to me on 2 face-to-face occasions. I spoke to a lady & I was in the right place. I don't know if it was wrong, right or otherwise, but I felt I had to explain that I suffered anxiety issues & that's why I had come to the property. She got me to write down my name & phone number, & told me she'd get the contractor to call me. She did say he was very busy at the moment. Then I went into the a local place that supplies fencing materials {not the disorganized one!} & got a quote on the strainer, inline & gate posts, gates & hinges - when I asked about delivery, they asked who I was getting to build it; when I told them who I hoped would be doing so - they knew, said he was the best & told me he would be able to collect the materials. I sooooooooooooooo hope that this goes through, I would be inclined, even if it is still way above my planned budget, to go ahead with this contractor, simply because of the recommendations & their locality.

Love to all

@Mazarita @eth @outlander @Appleblossom @Faith-and-Hope @Sophia1 @Teej

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thinking about you @eth

Darling friend,

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That is all sounding very good @Exoplanet .....

Fingers crosses for you 🤞💕

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm so excited, the local fence contractor rang & he's going to come out & do a quote on Sunday 😄 😄 😄 He said if he gets too busy, he'll ring & let me know - I think that was very kind of him. I'm daring to feel very positive about this 🙂

The local young lad came this afternoon & cut up a couple more of the posts, he took one back with him as he said it was easier to cut it up at his place, with his new chain saw sharpener. I told him that was fine & that I didn't expect to get reimbused at all & that I was very grateful for what he was doing for me 🙂

I got another section of netting up this afternoon, it's been a big day for me really, I've only just sat down 🙂

The puppies missed out on a walk in the forest, even though I went into town & took them with me, intending to do so - I forgot their leads! . . . honestly I think I would forget my head if it wasn't attached 😄

I want to spread a bit of my grateful feeling around

@MazaritaI hope you get a good nights sleep & wake up refreshed in the morning

@ethI hope one day your mother realizes the hurt she's caused & that you find the best professional help to ease your struggles

@Faith-and-HopeI hope your studies flow easily & are interesting & that Mr F&H appreciates you

@AppleblossomI hope your voice shines & all the animals are kind to you, & your son is good for you

@outlanderI hope you & your Pop feel better & your family finally appreciates you

@CheerBearI hope your new friend becomes more & you feel more than love, I hope you feel trust & true companionship, & I hope the little ones behave for you

@TeejI hope you feel happiness & your furry friend makes you smile

@Sophia1I hope you heal well & feel better & I hope you feel happy & loved

@PeppiPattyI hope Mr Budda appreciates you & you feel happiness & love

@BunniekinsI hope your son is feeling better & you are feeling safe & happy

Thank you, all of you, everyone here, for being here; I know you all struggle with your own battles, I'm very grateful to have friends to tell how my day has been 🙂Thank you all ❤️

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

thats great @Exoplanet hopefully your on the right path now!

dont worry i often loose my head too 😉

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Me 3 @outlander

I thought that was my saying!

So glad things are working out fence-wise. @Exoplanet

Glad they all treated you well. So they should.

Those practical aspects of custodianship of property can be taxing, but also pay off in many ways.

@Faith-and-Hope @Mazarita @eth

@PeppiPatty Love the cloth parrot.

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