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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

You look sweet when you blush, @CheerBear. That's my mind's image about now anyway.

Further progress here: just made myself a tuna and mayo sandwich for 'lunch'. Better late than never!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

i agree @Mazarita CB does look cute when she blushes

look at you kicking down goals today!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Awww you guys 😊 (this is my face 😁 really haha!)

Go you today @Mazarita!

I'm heading out for a while to tackle some nettle. Hope you all have a good one ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks, @outlander. I've also made the bed and tidied the bedroom.

@CheerBear, your news today makes me do this:

I'm taking off too now, @eth and everyone. Have a good remainder of the day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

a smile is even better @CheerBear
i just read on the other thread your little one is being cute. your such a good mum y'know helping your kids through their things esp with big needing to talk more
hope you have a good day

@Mazarita 🙂 go you!!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, @Exoplanet, @Teej, @CheerBear, @outlander, @Shaz51 and everyone,

back from my friend's place. Was so good to have something to draw me out of sleep today. The day was gorgeous out there as we were driving to her place. On the way back, there was someone walking along the footpath with a horse! Unexpected!

@Exoplanet, love the psychedelic travel gif.

@eth, hope your quiet day has been relaxing.

@outlander, wonder if you got your two sessions of work in today, sounds like it might have been a busy one.

@CheerBear, hope the glow has continued into the rest of your day.

@Teej, felt you under the like button. How are you going?

@Shaz51, hope your dinner last night was enjoyable and that you have been able to relax today.

An enjoyable Sunday night to all.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Teej

yep @Mazarita i jsut got back from doing the second lot. i had to drag the kids with me as well.
its exciting seeing horses on the street lol, i use to road ride quite often.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander, glad it's all done for the day. Have you still got the kids with you?

I didn't expect to see a horse there, it's kind of an inner city suburb.

One night some years ago C and I went for a night drive inland a little way and almost ran into a horse appearing straight at us out of the dark, riderless, cantering down the centre of the road. Lucky we didn't hit! We then went and found some locals who found the owner. Eventually we all went back and found it further down the road. It's a fairly busy road not far from the city parts!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

yep ive still got the kids. they will prob be with me for dinner too so im just organising that.

ooh thats abit scary, i wouldnt want to hit a horse. im usually on the other side trying to find them or rescue them!

hows your evening going?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm fragile and depressed tonight, @outlander, but safe and relaxed at home with it now. Just riding the moods, they are going up and down a bit, and are kind of mixed up at the same time too. I've been saying a mantra to myself on the in and out breath when I need to, which has been many times today. On the in breath, I say 'free'. On the out breath, I say 'now'. It helps free my mind of worries and bring my awareness into the present moment.

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