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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

good morning @eth @CheerBear @Exoplanet @Mazarita @Appleblossom@Bunniekins

have not read back...just trying to respond is enough at the moment...

dreams can be so frightening especially when waking up feeling that you are still in the dream...

I have been having weird dreams too that I remember as soon as I awake...then within minutes they are blocked...

having good blocks of sleep is so important for all of us ...mine have been stopped started ongoing for some time now too..

exoplanet glad that you are organising several quotes...have you asked your local council for recommendation...they used to keep that sort of information years ago when they were actually there to help the locals....

the sun is out...there is a breeze...cows have not been over here for a while..they tend to come closer to our fenceline in the warmer months as they take advantage of the shade from our gum trees...

greenpea I stopped on the way home from the pool...pulled over onto the verge of grass as there were three black calves chewing away...as I pulled up and opened the passenger seat window I frightened them away....so could not get close enough to take a photograph...will keep an eye out though...have not forgotten..

hoping that you are resting and taking time out for self-care greenpea..

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi to you too @Sophia1. Hope today is starting well for you.

I'm thinking of you too @Bunniekins and sending hugs for whatever you're going through xx

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hearing you there @eth. I don't like that it's bad enough to have experienced what happened but to then experience it again a bad again in memories, dreams, body reminders - ugh. Maybe it is that there is more space for reminders again now or that the EMDR is unsettling, that's causing the increase in dreams and their intensity. I find going through the processes of things like the NDIS a trigger for it also as it's all linked and related.

Thanks for sharing that link. It makes sense that generalised anxiety and trauma related anxiety may be different. The idea of needing to be in a safe situation before really being able to work through and process it all, is the driving factor in my rollercoaster I feel.

I was just reading The Mighty also. The article I was reading was on looking happy but living with depression. Love The Mighty ☺

Morning @Sophia1 and sending you big hugs for your dreams too. I agree with the importance of sleep. Disrupted sleep can definitely make things harder!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning coffee infinity contemplation

Different perspectives

Hello Everyone 🙂

Found a couple of giphys I liked & thought I'd share 😉

@Sophia1funny you asked about enquiring at the Council, I didn't think of that, but I asked my local librarian & Community center & was given the same 2 names. 1 isn't doing fencing at the moment & they gave me the other name on my list. That 1 has no listing on the internet, I even had trouble finding their phone number & address - I need the address as I don't make phone calls, I think I've found it, but I'm worried they'll think it's rude turning up on their doorstep unannounced? Reckon I'll try the council before I just rock-up on a strangers property, thanks for the idea

Love to all

@Mazarita @eth @Appleblossom @CheerBear @outlander @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

welcome @Exoplanet

helping each other along the way helps lighten the load...

you are handling all of this so very well..

the other option is the place where you bought the materials...they might have knowledge of people in the industry...

good luck

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Sophia1, @Mazarita, @Exoplanet, @CheerBear, @eth, @outlander

Sunny here today , they say we are getting rain on Monday , seeing some clouds outside now

Got a birthday dinner to go to tonight -- don't know what to wear ??

I know --- Clothes

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good evening everyone. Have been mostly sleeping all day, with tiny wake breaks on the computer in between, not long enough to reply to anyone so far today. Now C has gone out to visit a mate so home alone, and finally awake, on a Saturday night.

@eth, I did leave the forum for about seven months at one time but not planning on going anywhere soon. Sorry about the other dreams that have had you on edge. I scanned the article on The Mighty, helped me understand a bit more about how things are for you and others.

@Sophia1, again, fabulous news from your latest health appointment!

@CheerBear, I really relate to looking happy but being depressed.

@Exoplanet, love the gifs, especially the eternal coffee! Love to you.

@Shaz51, hope you are enjoying the birthday dinner now, or very soon.

An enjoyable evening to all.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello @eth

You have raised a valid point...anxiety from trauma...and or continued trauma is definitely different from general anxiety...

Thank you for posting the link...I shall look into that when I have the time and mindset to do so...

I relate to the circumstances you mentioned as well sadly..enough said...

take care

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning everyone ☺

Hope your Saturday night home alone was OK @Mazarita. Wondering if you're up and how you're doing this morning.

Hi @eth, @Exoplanet, @Sophia1, @Shaz51 (you made me laugh with the clothes comment yesterday - hope you enjoyed dinner) and all

Sending best for the day ahead for everyone ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Ha ha yes @CheerBear, clothes xx

It was a lovely night , even though everyone kept asking how my mum was who is still in hospital

Off to visit D1 who has flown home for the weekend

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