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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning @Mazarita and everyone

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey there @Mazarita

Thanks for the tag. I hope you have a good day today and that you enjoy seeing your friend

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @MDT

Do you feel like a chat? Wondering how you are going today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I'm not bad thanks @Mazarita

I've had an intense week though. Two interviews on Monday and also a job offer. It's a casual job I do from home so it's extra money whilst I look for a part time or full time position. It's been hard to even get to this point but it's progress and I am happy about that.

Today I am just drafting up some cover letters. I hope. Also doing the work I've now got. It's for a tutor company. I create modules for them to teach.

Other than that, same old I guess.

HOw are you?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@MDT, haha, snap! I think we posted on each other's thread at the same time. Have already posted on yours.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Teej @Mazarita @eth @outlander @CheerBear@Shaz51@Exoplanet @Bunniekins

and all others passing through..

@eth

I hope that your time spent with your mum becomes less overpowering for you....I am not sure of her health situation...if you have previously mentioned that...Having our own space is so vitally important....

@Teej

Yes I think that we might live in the same state...it is either yourself or one other female who has been on here about the same time as us...no matter....I am pleased to read that you are finding some ups in the overall ups and downs..keep on believing in yourself...you have come this far with your inner strength...

@Bunniekins

a day of rest I think that you said....necessary when we know that we need it...I hope that you continue to enjoy your walking and greenpea time..

@Mazarita

All of that intense cleaning and polishing your home for an inspection is so very exhausting....I know how I feel when we have to prepare for open inspections...the house has to look more like a show home...even inside the cupboards and drawers...ridiculous..is what it is...the lead up I think is as intense if not more so than the final touches of cleaning...Yes it is nice to enjoy the feeling of it being that way after for a short period...does not take long here for the dust to settle...cat fur...untidy husband...including myself of late having things out within easier reach..office is a total clutter of piles to look at..piles to do..piles half done etc etc etc...

winter also adds the clothes horses that hold the washing which would otherwise snap in the frost outside..resembling a chinese laundry a term I remember my father using....had to laugh at nature rinse @Exoplanet have been down that track many times over the years...hope that you get the fence situation sorted and at a stage that allows you to feel more secure...

@CheerBear

sorry...I did not realise that you had been in hospital and are leaving today possibly? glad that you found some benefit...yes timing could not be better for your ndis application ...having support from the facility is good to hear...reassuring when we hear of good situations ..experiences within a not good mental health system...

@outlander

Did I read that you fell over somewhere? I hope that did not further harm your wrist..I think that I read you are aching all over which is an awful feeling...I hope that you find some relief soon...

@Shaz51

my goodness all of those appointments....a nightmare making times especially with your mum and mr Shaz to be considered....It is a pity that you can't get them to all meet in the same building on the same day...this system would work so well...specialists are renowned for having tunnel vision...thinking within their own field only not looking at their client as a whole person...this way they could actually hear about other symptoms that you are dealing with and work together...wouldn't that be great...in a fantasy world...

Had to smile at the scotrish mention...brought back flashing memories of conversations I had on here with you and @Mazarita some time ago now...gosh must be years...well definitely more than one year...that was fun....I had completely forgotten about that...my mind has been such a mash... I must dwell on the memory returning...so thank you dearest @Shaz51...

Having one side of my family tree as Irish for as far as documents travel back...I found this phrase:

“Ar an mhéar fhada”, as in to postpone something; it comes from the Irish proverb “Cuir gach rud ar an mhéar fhada agus beidh an mhéar fhada róghairid ar ball”, which means “If you put everything on the long finger, then the long finger will be too short in time.”

I can hear you all trying to pronounce the words now laugh...good luck with that...

hope that you all get to smile at something today...some days I have just gone through the stages of practising smiling...even that is better than not...

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Hi Mazzy hoping you are meeting up with your new friend and enjoying this beautiful weather. Rock on Spring (even though we still have officially 2 months of winter to go) 🙂 xxxx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

morning @Sophia1

yes you did, a few days ago i tripped over my own feet because i was so tired and letheragic. face planted the floor, didnt have time to react to it. im alright though, my hand didnt take any of the weight thankfully.

lol im not even going to attempt those words! its interesting how things translate though.

how are you?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello Everyone

Winter's supposed to kick back in today in my area, it hasn't yet though; in fact I slept most of night under just a sheet - it is a flannel sheet, but isn't it meant to be the middle of the coldest season?

I'm still running ideas around in my head about the fence. I don't like the variable cost, I understand that the ground may change from one spot to the next, but I'd much prefer a fixed cost. This young man has admitted he doesn't have a lot of experience, I've never received a receipt or invoice from him; I'm thinking of working out, step by step, what I believe is a reasonable price & putting it to him. I have always paid him in full, in cash; I would pay him the same in 2 lots, 1st for the product as he is providing the hardwood posts, 2nd for the labour, a fixed price upon completion of the front fence. I wonder if that is acceptable for a young man still finishing senior levels at school?

Love to all

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning all @Mazarita @outlander @Bunniekins @Sophia1 @Shaz51 @Teej @CheerBear and anyone else here today.

So........Mum and 1/2 sis left yesterday afternoon and I've been completely exhausted since then.

Hope you are all doing ok and that some of us can chat sometime today.

Sil's mother moves into the next door house that sil and bro also own today. We're expecting the removalists to arrive any time now.

No rest for the wicked/weary!

Could tell some tales about the last few days but wanted to pop in and say hi first. I have lots of tags to check out in my notifications - thanks for the tags folks.

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