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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita @outlander I'm going to work on my dream catcher for the first time in many months. Time for something creative that takes my mind off all the IRL stuff that's been busying my brain.

Hope today works out well for you both and I'll no doubt catch you later xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh yay thats great @eth enjoy!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hope you enjoy the creative burst with the dream catcher, @eth. A lovely thing to be doing on a Saturday.

@outlander, yes, fisiocrem is worth a go, I reckon. Make sure you put enough on though. I didn't use enough when I first started with it and it wasn't as effective.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Ill have to have a look, we have a bif chemist warehouse thing so im sure i could find it there or ask id they coukd order it in if they dont have it.
Mums got a few plans so might go with her and the kids but will see how i go. @Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Well, I think I'd better go offline now, @outlander. Gotta start getting ready to go out soonish. Thanks for the chat this morning, lovely to see you again. May you have a peaceful, nurturing, gentle day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @Mazarita you too 💞

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It's very nice to read your messages @Mazarita.... How nice to see your old friend.

I have two dear old friends we have all known each other for not as long as you ( 14 years old ) but 17 years old for one and 19 years old for the other.... we catch up every year once a year for a day to celebrate our birthdays and we give each other gifts. It must be over 10-15 years we have done this. It's a bit of a highlight for all of us and my husband also comes.....because he's Mr Buddha.... and Arlo because he's Arlo...

It does bring a lovely feeling of being comfortable doesn't it......

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello Everyone

The fence contractor didn't come yesterday, but they did send a message to let me know they were too busy. I had arranged another quote, they are supposed to come today, when I told the 1st contractor of this current quote, as they'd offer to come next week, they then told me they were booked out until September. So I suppose a drizzle of hope seeps through to today, though I really felt there was something not quite right about this current contractor; they weren't really recommended on the community website, they put their own hand up - no-one mentioned anything about them, & when I tried to 'look up' details of the business they say they own . . . I could find nothing but an empty facebook page, no details, no other sites, no phone number listed. I still think what business doesn't advertise their number everywhere they can so that customers can contact them. They {he} sent his number in a message to me, I was deciding whether to send a text or not when somehow I accidently sent it, just Hello & my name, as that was as far as I had gotten because I was still unsure whether I should or not. I kind of see that as fate, I kind of see it as my Mother interviening. He rang immediately & made arrangements to come this afternoon, I've given him my location, there's still a part of me that feels something isn't quite right. I live in a pretty remote area, the reason I was trying to find someone closer is because I image there will be travelling costs involved with those in the cities, but I'm not getting much choice, no others seem interested, so I guess I'll see what happens this afternoon.

Mazy I read somewhere that you have ulcers due to your dental treatment? I'm sorry to hear that Good old salt water, in a weak solution, on a regular basis {definately after a smoke - nag, nag, nag } Hope it's healing quickly

Love to you Outlander, I don't really leave this thread so I don't know what's happening in your world, even so I know your bravery of never giving up, is shining through

Kidneys are the reason my doctor keeps mentioning tests Shaz, I've stopped taking the medication she told me might be damaging them & the sores have all but healed now. The aches & pains raise their ugly heads on occasions & if they outweigh the damage they cause verses the relief they give while I'm still alive, I'll start taking them again. But then I am a rather stubborn looney

I like the oddballs too GP, in fact I'm fairly certain that most would perceive me as a definate!

Thank you all for being the people that you are 🙂

@Mazarita @outlander @eth @CheerBear @Bunniekins @Shaz51

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Dear @CheerBear what is Catt support? This might be what my husband needs who is actually starting to vebilize his problems with me which is very good ........since 2010 he has never done this ......we did have a break for 18 months when I put a restraining order on him .......he then cleaned his act up.....

did you have your yummy coffee ? My son just turned up to use my computer so my father in law ( fil) gave me his Ol' iPad..... I feel very with it babe .... That's it .... I'm cool ....... An iPad.....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Afternoon everyone ☺

@eth the place I'm staying is mostly available in my state as far as I know which isn't where you are. It's such a shame because it really is an incredible service. It's publicly funded so it costs nothing and it's up to a four week stay, designed as a step up from home or down from hospital with clinical (if needed and overseen by clinicians) and non-clinical support. I can't find any in NSW or anything really that's like it. I wonder if looking into sub-acute short term residential care might bring up something similar though? I often think people here could benefit from places like this and really wish there were more of them. Hope you enjoy your dreamcatcher making! I can picture it being so beautiful.
Hey @PeppiPatty ☺ CATT is the crisis assessment and treatment team. They're the adult mental health community team who work short term with people experiencing an acute episode or mental health crisis. They also do short term case management and refer to other supports. Where I am, referral to CATT is via a central psych triage number and you can self refer or have someone refer you. Its great to hear your husband is talking and it sounds like he's trying to reach out. That's the first step! I did have my yummy coffee thanks. Enjoy the iPad and the 'with it babeness' that comes with it 😁
Hiya @Mazarita 😊 I use gmail too so that could be it. I emailed about the issue a couple of weeks ago after posting about it on the notifications thread that I saw you posted about also. I hope it gets sorted soon but understand it may take some time too.
Hugs for you @Exoplanet 💗. That sounds like a bit of stress and worry. I hope there's an outcome you're happy and comfortable with soon.
I've had a bit of a busy morning with my little crew and am taking a time out break from it for a moment before going through a list of things they want to do together today. We went out this morning and stopped off at where I am staying so they could see it and meet some of my friends there. They were heart warming to watch and came out saying how nice it was there. I think it's great for them to see that it's not scary and it's really nice, plus everyone chatted to them about how much I talk about them and miss them. My heart feels good for it ❤
Hope the afternoon goes well for all ☺👋
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