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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita@outlander@eth have to go and clean up. Will be on about 4.30am!!! hope to see one of you then 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Exoplanet, catching up at last from posts here today. Sounds like you have learned a lot about the issues surrounding fences on property boundaries. I guess the only way to approach it is what you are doing, learning as you go. Seems like you are doing it well, even when the challenges are affecting mood. I echo @Appleblossom's words about how you are resourceful and willing to face fears. You get things done, it seems to me. State of Origin is on TV. I'm not really into it, it's C's choice of programming for this block of the day.

@eth, you so go dealing with that much socialising. Intense but it seems you have enjoyed it too. I love the idea of your bro and his music friend sending sweet music into your cabin. I appreciate that kind of gentle creativity you were describing in anyone. Glad to read that there was some appreciation of your cooking for sil's festivities.

@outlander, I know what you mean by repetition getting boring. I've always struggled with routines. I think it was expecially hard when I was younger. There's more energy bursting out of you then. It can feel like it is stifled by the mundane aspects of life. Even now, I struggle with mundane things like housework (as you know). To answer your earlier question, it's medical/dental appointments this week, housework and meeting a new friend for coffee. Also will see my close friend during that time, we don't make dates, just arrange it on the phone when we feel like it, which is often. And I'll be doing video too. I can imagine looking after 6 horses would be quite some work.

@Bunniekins, happy your son's birthday went well. He sounds very sweet in the way you describe him. He's lucky to have you as a mum who loves him. From other things you wrote, yes, C and I have been lucky in the places we've lived, though there's always downsides too, I find. But I have been far better housed in Queensland than I ever was down south.

Hi @Appleblossom, @Sophia1, @Mulgajane, @Shaz51, @Faith-and-Hope, @Teej and everyone I can't think to tag just now. Hope the rest of the night treats you well.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Well actually its 9 if i count my own horses. I was looking after 12 including my own mid last yr. I wont be taking thar much on again. I hope all appts go well and you enjoy the time with your friends too.
I actually dont have alot of energy, i tend to just push through the tiredness. Its more i dunno how to explai it. My life isnt that bad its just feels empty despite having ao many things to do. I know my mh has alot to do with it too though. Im sure things will work out eventually though.
@Mazarita

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That seems a lot of horses for one person to take care of, @outlander. You must be quite skilled in looking after them. Then you look after your pop and your siblings too. It's good, what you do. Didn't realise you had three horses yourself. Are you a very experienced rider? It's great to hear you say that it will work out okay in time. How is your arm and hand going?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It comes naturally now. I was riding and looking after horses before i could walk @Mazarita i am an experienced rider however im always learning. I dont ride anymore though so if i was to buy one for myself id look for alot safer. My sisters own one each and mum has one that i look after. Even mums lost faith in my horsing skills now. Not the greatest feeling thats for sure.

My hand and arm are ok. I took pain meds a while ago so thats helping. Its still in 'shock' i guess i could call it from lifting heavy things the other day. But its not as bad now which im happy with

Hows your night going?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Glad to hear the pain meds are helping, @outlander, and that healing seems to be slowly happening.

My night has been fine. I have a video uploding to the net. Not the final draft but I want to send this version to collaborator and can only do it by uploading. So I'm on my slow mobile, part of the reason I'm taking so long between posts. The other reason is that I'm getting up and doing stuff between posts.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thats ok @Mazarita take your time.
Im glad your evening is going well. Sounds like your being productive between postings.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Some of what I'm doing, @outlander, is just wandering around the flat rather than just sit in a chair for so long. Slight exercise, lol. Upload is finished now. On my trusty computer again. My computer's name is 'Spinner'. I always name my computers, lol. Are you doing anything else aside from the forum?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita I hope you are ok with what I wrote. I wanted you to be able to read something you were mentioned in.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh @Mazarita why spinner? I giggled reading that 😄

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