Sleeping too much

Go gently ... as in "go gently on yourself @Former-Member" .... recovery time .... breathe .... nourish .... positive self-talk .... no black dogs allowed ... !!

💐🤗 Hugs ....

Hi @PeppiPatty

Sorry your husband gets weird and has his Christmas thing bad enough to give you panic attacks. I am learning enough now to know that people do what people do and we all have ways of reacting and you have told us just enough to know that you have a bit of "hell-on-wheels" right now.

How I love my life alone - I can do what I want when I want but I do remember the years when this was not the case.

Ah - @Former-Member - was it you who wanted to know who the really needy people in your area are - the minister at a local church would probably know but a more reliable source would be the local police - but when it comes to giving to needy people - mostly churches make up hampers or give presents to indigneous children -

But yeah - some people do not know what to do about money - I went to the show one year - and at that time I was a full welfare recipient myself and often had to get a food voucher - so I was kinda surprised to see thin people with a lot of children getting stacks of show-bags and those children were ill-clad and I was thinking at those people would be getting a food vouchers at the end of the week - and somehow this never seemed right to me

Like how much fun do kids get out of showbags and how much better to have a full tummy at bedtime

But then - all my life I have known what to do with my money and I should not judge - but yeah - if you have little and shepherd what you do have - it seems not right to be handing it out to the children of the careless - but the kids can't help it

Darn - such a complex world

Dec

Hi @Former-Member

Here's that pic of the cloud that came ahead of the asthma storm - I think a lot of people got sick from that storm - it's my gift to you because it was some kind of puzzle to crop the pic to get it up - but it sure was a creepy cloud

This week is the build-up - aw - it that why I have been feeling so crappy - I thought it was my sinuses - actually maybe one thing adds to another and we can miss the in-beween bits - I have been feeling rotten all weekend and badly need a bath.

I felt to giddy to immerse myself in a small pond of water - I am not into leaving early because I am careless about what I do when my head is in a different room - or it feels as if it's a balloon above my head - but whatever - I was getting ready to have a shower on Friday night and the hot tap blew apart - like - screeching and splash and yell - darn and run a bath - standing there in the altogher wondering what people do while they are running a bath - still - it's not all that easy to get out and I will have to do that today - but maybe more water would be a good idea

It's such great fun to have a full bath and lie there getting pruny and looking at my knees and toes sticking out of the bubbles and making the nurturing feeling last - but I have to soak out all the creaks - my right knee had surgery a few years ago - there was a large benign tumour in there - it had torn both the menisci - what fun - it all healed up but still - yeah - it is the same knee I always had but two arthroscopies for sporting injuries on the same area has made it Mr Creaky Knee - but there are worse things

The run-up - oh yes - it would be 30 years since his 16th birthday when we gave him a party and he got angry because be bought a lot of beer and his Dad confiscated it because we had underage children there - he got furious about that but it's a whole other story. He would be 47 on Friday - and it's hard to think that he would be so near the 50 mark and I haven't seen him getting older. My dd is around - I see her from time to time and I notice that she is not longer a teenager - life has had it's ups and downs for her but I don't think about her getting older - she just is

But my son will always have acne but never wrinkles - crows feet, sun-spotss, melanoma - all those things like bunions ands crook knees that those of us who go on are heir to.

But I am 30 years into it and there is something - a hidden gift in getting older - there is less time to grieve - and this is not something I want to catch up with in the last fews days of my life - there are other things to remember - I have given him so much time

So if it helps - giving our lost children our time now when we need to is a good thing - as the years pass the grief moves aside for life to happen - and it does

But we never forget them

Dec

Hi @Former-Member

Thanks for your best wishes for my health - I have been feeling pretty ordinary all weekend and having a slow start today - ah yes - it certainly makes it tough picking up the bits and pieces after a couple of days doing practically nothing but read

I agree about regrets - we do have them and pushing them away doesn't help - they need time to be processed too and also - what do we learn from our mistakes? With due thought - we might just go on making the same mistakes over and over again -

We need to nurture ourselves - I wonder why it is so hard for women to do that when men often seem to think they need all the nurturing. I have been thinking about that all weekend

Yes - you only need to spend as much time as you feel is helpful to yourself here @Former-Member - you contribute a lot - you need time for yourself as well

Dec

No @Former-Member

You are not talking too much but your Mum has waffleitis - ouch - that hurts and it's not my mother

But wow - being alive hurt my mother so she never got in touch with me - like - there was a small patch of time but when my father died that all stopped - but she never rang me about my son - ever -

And you will understerstand this - I love flowers - to me flowers say it all - they mean so much - aw - it hurt I never got any flowers from her when Rowan died

But a few days later we got a couple of cold chickens - d'uh - had they been alive and female we would have kept them to lay eggs - we always had a couple of chooks laying eggs - at least there would have been some life in the gift - but cold chickens???? I seem to remember they had been cooked

Tawney - that has to be the coldest, most heartless - mournful and empty set of texts around your daughter's birthday - I think the empiness of no phonecalls at all ever is easier to deal with the destruction totally toughtless contains

I am so sorry - I really am

Dec - ah - what can I find?

🎉🎊🎉🎊

Christmas in the park sounds like a fabulous idea to npmentioned @Former-Member ❣

Do you have any community notice boards .... like in the local supermarket or something ?

Maybe check with the police or the town council first .... there might be some by-laws to nod to .... and no alcohol probably ...

I know that the police like to have advanced warning about any "parties" so they have a heads-up about any potential trouble-makers .... which is highly unlikely in the middle of the day .... and they might even join you for a snag ....

😊🎈🎉🎄🍡🌭☕️🎊🗝🎶