Self Harm

@Angels333 Lots of these. 💕💜💕💜💕

@Maggie @Zoe7 @Shaz51 @Owlunar @Jhaneylena @Bunniekins @Appleblossom @Snowie @Molliex

I've had a really dark few weeks SH everyday, really not living. My Psychiatrist increased my mood stabilizer and alongside that I have accepted some of my triggers, mostly trauma memories . I think that's definitely making an impact on my mood, I'm feeling less anxious. The SH is still quite bad and happening everyday and I really needed to unpack all the trauma stuff with my psychologist but he canceled my appointment due to a funeral. So I won't see him for two weeks. I'm not going to DBT this week either as Son 2 has his high school graduation.

I'm really down about how SH chips away at my self-respect leaving me feeling worthless.

I see my Psychiatrist next Thursday it feels like an eternity

My ability to resist, distract and delay is non existent, I feel so hopeless.

Angels333

Hearing you about not being able to phone and talk about feelings with children at home ... @Angels333

Its not as simple as some people think ....

SOme how I had to Hang on til my kids grew up ... and still I am getting flack from not being able to hold everything in ... it is what it is ... we try our best ...

Good that you are unpacking the trauma tho ... its the way to go for ultimate resolution ...

Just good to hear from you .... struggling through .... whilst being there ...

its a form of love

Hi @Angels333

I can't say much about SH because I haven't experienced it but from what I have read in the forums it's something real and it takes over your life - from what I gather it's something real - something that can be seen - and the mental pain people have is so much worse often than physical pain but for a moment the physical pain can distract us - maybe easing the anguish by doing something else - I don't know but I am sure you needn't apologize for it - especially here - where people suffer so much from the SI and SH and even SA issues

It's rotten isn't it - when someone else's life gets in the way of our plans for survival - a funeral yes - a necessary rites of passage for other people - sometimes for ourselves and the people we know - been to several - they are carefully planned for and organised in great detail but most of the time they are necessary without warning and we have our appointments and you had to wait a couple of weeks - not good at all when you are so stressed out - I hear you on that one - cancelled appointments really throw a spanner through our time and space

And life goes on

Good work recognising your triggers - that would have been hard work - we all have triggers and they can really spoil the day if not the whole week - perhaps the more we understand them the better we can deal with them - I get it - and so good to hear that the change of medication is helping too - you needed that

Continuing to send best thoughts Angel

And yes - trying to use Life Line or any other service when we have other people around is difficult - we need privacy for such calls - and children need your attention as soon as you are on a private call -

Dec

Oh @Angels333 I'm so sorry you're suffering so much. I can hear your pain, but also your will to keep fighting.

I understand the feeling of an appointment being so far away that you're not sure how you'll get through. Just remember lifeline, beyond blue, and suicide callback service all have online chat (service times vary) if thats easier than calling.

If it becomes unsafe, and you're able to, please go to a hospital or GP before your psych appointment.

Here with you. You're not alone 💕

@Angels333 Hearing you, and how hard it is. All we can do, is what we can, to get through as best we can. Walking with you, understanding the pain and waiting to see your psychiatrist. 💜💜💜

Hi @Angels333

I understand. I have had no control over my sh lately either.

It is so hard to control and takes all our energy just trying not to do it.

Sitting with you whilst you are wating for your pdoc appt.

@Snowie @Maggie @Molliex @Owlunar @Appleblossom

Thanks for your encouragement and support.

Suicide call back service is offline for chat, has been for a few days now.

Things are the same tonight it's really bringing me down .

Your comments made me feel less alone tonight so thanks again for the encouragement.

Snowie, sorry to hear you are struggling too. Sending hugs xxx

Love Angels333

Don't stop reaching out for help @Angels333. Lifeline chat is available in the evenings. Please call a support line or MH professional before it gets bad. Go in the bathroom and turn the shower on or sit in the car. Whatever you need to do for some privacy.

I'm here ❤️🌻

@Molliex I will reach out somehow. I like the SANE chat too. I really don't want this existence to be my normal!

Love Angels333 xxx