Self Harm

Hey @Angels333

so happy to hear this. I was feeling massively stressed when stress should have left earlier.

now I'm crusin late hours alone. 👌🏼 people r hard work. As I see it. My world maybes. A zone is better then the other!
Super happy you are in a good place. ❤️
I am presently. Better than my current week. 🙂

Hello @Former-Member

Not sure if you meant you are feeling better currently than last week ... or ... the feeling I gathered from your post was that your were being and becoming. Sometimes thats enough.

@Angels333Great you managed the struggle agin harming the self. Still it sounded stressful, not being sure where things really are, in terms of your father's health, your mother's statements and past memories. You seem to have made sound decisions though, despite uncertainties. Go you.

@Zoe7

Just Hugs. You are a trooper. In ye olde days, the profesisonal job of a teacher would have occurred with support on domestic scene. Sometimes we women seem to do double the work.

I am bumbling along. Made a lot of mulch today, and thinking of my father and brother. I was good and went to a zoom choir thingo, but not wanting to socialise. All too hard, instead went to the garden. A little SI but not too bad, maybe missing my cat too.

No doubt you are missing your little buddy @Appleblossom It can never be underestimated the love and company they bring to us and losing them is heartbreaking on so many levels. Grieve as you need to Apple 😥

Thanks @Zoe7

I make mulch by hand just breaking up twigs and cutting back overgrowth. The repetitive nature helps and its outside and doing good.

I find gardening does the same @Appleblossom but having the energy lately to do all that I want to do has been hard. I did a big clean out of one section and a lot of tree pruning a couple of weeks ago but had to be really careful of my hand so did not get it even close to finished. It of course took twice as long with one hand which was frustrating but at least it was a start.

I also had to brush Toby afterwards because he wanted to be right net to me and so was covered in leaves, twigs and grass - but he enjoyed himself lol

@Zoe7Of course we cant be doing everything all the time. Respect your energy levels.

The main reason I do my gardening is I am older and have some economic security, but my needs are very simple. I was glad to read today that piano teachers (in Melb) are allowed to teach at home and in students homes again. SInging and wind teachers are not permitted due to aerosol production of the instrument, so choirs will be a while sorting out protocols before going live or indoors. I feel better teaching a little, as it moves me into capable side of myself with some control and understanding of what to do.

It will be great for you to get back to teaching a little @Appleblossom and hope that choirs can get up and running soon too. It has been such a difficult time for that outlet that you enjoy so being able to do some of it will be good.

Goodnight @Appleblossom Going to bring Cat in from outside and see if I can sleep

@Zoe7 @Appleblossom @Former-Member @Molliex @TAB @Bunniekins @Faith-and-Hope @Adge @MDT @BlueBay @Shaz51 @Former-Member and everyone else...

Just an update... my anxiety is too much sometimes. I said an inappropriate thing at work placement coming from insecurities I have about myself. I've been feeling suicidal but have managed to avoid self harm... I know I'm drinking too much...

I know I have so much potential but I'm self sabotaging....

I have so many commitments with the kids, work and study I don't know if I'm coming or going sometimes...

Anyway...

XOXO ANGELS333