Dark place

Hi Aeiou,

I'm sorry to read that you're feeling really helpless at the moment. You will get an email from me shortly.

Take care of yourself. thecolourblue

Hugs @Former-Member

are the meds helping you my friend ???

my mr shaz tries to go off his meds too my @Former-Member but after a few days he has to go back on them again which is better

he still has his ups and downs but way better with meds

sometimes it seems hard my friend xx

so the other day mr shaz and i sat down and did the pros and he cons , can you do this for me xxxx

walking with you and encouraging you to keep going

hello@Former-Member

Hi @Former-Member , feel in a fairly similar position in some ways.

I have bipolar 2 and have been weending myself away from meds for a few months now (with doctors guidance). I'm down to one med now instead of two. It hasn't made any difference to how I feel mentally and physically at this stage. My main problem is the side effects impact on my thinking more than my original issues so to Me the meds are a waste of time and doing more harm than good.

Each of us is different. My GP is terrible. I feel some comfort in talking with my Psychologist, but, even that isn't as good as it was. I think life will/would be different without the meds, but, its a time thing as your body has to get rid of the meds and that might take 1-2 months. I hope you can find the energy to keep trying and challenging them about your state of mind and well being. I know it can be draining, frustrating and soul sapping and I've only been doing it a fairly short period of time. I feel that doctors have ruined my life to a certain extent.

Do you exercise, eat fairly healthy and sleep alright? For me those are the key and very important.

Dark place I am hearing you loud and clear. I am also at this stage where I just want to stop everything. Nothing seems to be working. I try to talk to my family about it and I get told stay on your meds. You will find a doctor that will resonate with you blah blah.yet here we are another day. And it’s hard damn hard. So we ask why am I here another day. What is it I have to learn or doing wrong. A constant mind battle. It’s like is this me talking or the other guy. That’s when it becomes dangerous. All I can say and like me you’ve heard it a million times like a scratched record don’t give up. There is

something for us when I don’t know. But if we can survive this and live through this

we have a story to tell or help that one person that is going through the same. I can live with that and so can you I believe. Hope the darkness soon turns to light for you. We need you here.

Hi All,

the darkness hasn't shifted and I'm stuck in hospital and don't see how this is going to help and I am so angry with everything, the system, the people around me, and mostly myself. I've been at this point so many times. I always get back in my head to the 'you can't ask that' series on SBS 'survivors of sexual assault' and the older guy who killed himself shortly after the series was on air. What on earth am I fighting for? I'm too numb to feel anything for the people that love me and theoretically I should love to and they should be my reason to be here. But I don't feel them, it's like I'm not here anyway.

Hi @Former-Member ,
Good to hear from you on the forums. I am sorry that things seem so difficult for you at the moment and hope that things will seem a little brighter soon. You say that you're not sure how being in hospital will help but maybe it will give you some relief to be in a safe space for a while with professional support. I think I've read that in the past you have made promises to yourself to stay alive for a certain period of time. Maybe that sort of approach can help you now?

Hi @outlander

thank you. I do talk to the nurses, I struggle to see progress and have many dark thoughts. Time?

how are you?

Hi @outlander

i hope your day will improve. Being busy is good.

i think I’ll be in hospital for a while, I still struggle too much with self-harm urges and I am a bit down whether it’s going to change.i haven slept well for a long time now.

Hi @Gazza75

how are you doing?