EMDR - Has anyone done this

I am glad you are here too Hon

I'm heading off to get a few things done before bed @Former-Member Goodnight - hope you sleep well

Good morning @Doglover I wanted to say Hi before I go check all my notifications. I really hope things have settled down for you and you have some relief from symptoms by now. Wondering whether you've gone home yet and if so how that is going for you. Looking forward to hearing from you and sending warm wishes.

Hi @Former-Member and others here @MDT @MaggieM @Zoe7 @Gazza75 @outlander Following the discussion and sending caring wishes Donna1. Great to see the support you are receiving and to hear things went so well with the new psychologist and the EMDR. I had a really busy day yesterday, but should be around a fair bit today. There's a thread called 'Saturday Soiree - all welcome' that's a social space to hang out on the weekend and open to everyone. I'll be there mostly today, once I've caught up on my notifications from yesterday. https://saneforums.org/t5/Social-Spaces/Saturday-Soiree-all-welcome/m-p/740836#M158812

Take care all.

@eth @Doglover @Zoe7 @MDT @Gazza75 @outlander @Shaz51 @Judi9877

Think ive got everyone.

Well i went for a 5km walk then spent the day writing this letter to my mother. ( not to send yet)

It wasnt as hard as i thought, rather time consuming.

Ill just keep editing it.

The Psychologist asked me if i ever thought i could have a relationship with her & i said no.

Shes avoided admitting & taking responsibility for her actions all her life. At 80+ shes not going to change.

Still ill b content letting her know the damage she did.

Ill just have to come to terms with the fact i never had any support or protection from her & will never have a relationship with her.

Yrs ago i tracked down my neighbour. I used to hide in her hse to get away from my family. I asked her what it was with my mother & why she hated me so much. She said didnt you know, she was jealous of you.

Its just hard being around people that have had good relationships with their parents. I longed for it all my life.

My father abandoned me by being an alcoholic & my mother controlled me.

I have to keep working on building back my self worth & confidence. Its just such a long lonely journey.

Ive lived my life without them so ill continue on without them.

You're not alone anymore @Former-Member - you have us now. Good on you for writing your letter today. Good idea to let it percolate and go back and edit over time. My mum is 79 and still a narcisist, in total denial of her abuse when we were kids, not going to change at this stage, so I feel some of what you're feeling. Take care and be gentle with yourself this evening. It's probably brought up a lot for you.

@Doglover thinking about you a lot today. Sending care and concern, along with warm wishes.

Great job in writing the letter @Former-Member We often find when we start those things it does just come to us - especially when we have put so much thiught into it beforehand. That doesn't make it any easier but you did it and that is impressive.

At your mother's age you are probably right - she will not change her attitude or beliefs around you - but that is her issue - you have risen above all that despite the hurt. You have made your own family with your son and that is a special bond you have. The past has not stopped you doing the right thing by him nor loving him and that is rewarding in itself.

You are stronger than your realise but those feelings of self-worth and confidence are so hard to have for ourselves when our life has been riddled with pain. You are taking steps to work on that though and that is very positive - from small things big things grow and I hope that is the case for you Hon

Thanks

Ill rest up tonight

@Former-Member sitting with you