Lost my faith in everything

Hi @Former-Member sorry to hear things are feeling tough right now. It's great that you've reached out to the SANE community for support. I'm also going to send you an email to check in 🙂

We're sorry to hear that @Former-Member, do you have anyone that you are able to chat to?

@Ali11 there is no one...i thought i could talk to my partner but he has made it clear he doesn't want to be involved...i don't trust the medical professionals I've been seeing...they've only made things worse...i don't have any friends because I'm "too difficult to deal with"...I'm 43 and i just want to die every goddamn day...

Hey @Former-Member,

It sounds like you are going through an incredibly difficult time at the moment, I am really glad that you are reaching out for support here on the forums. I am a moderator here at SANE and after reading your post i am wanting to check in with you. Just responding to your post to let you know i have sent you an email.

Warmest Regards,

Turqoise.

Hi there @Former-Member
Welcome to the forums. I can see that a couple of the other moderators have been concerned that you might be having thoughts of suicide and sent you emails to check in with you. Maybe you didn't receive it which is why you say you don't understand the check in? If you are concerned about your immediate safety you might consider contacting one of the services below. Please take care of yourself.

Lifeline: 13 11 14 or Crisis Chat

Suicide call back service: 1300 659 467 or online counselling

Samaritans: 135 247

If in immediate danger: 000

@Former-Member i received the emails...i get that ppl are concerned...but this isn't for counselling it says so i don't understand the point...

I read the emails again...i understand now...it's a cut n paste thing...yeh I've had bad experiences with lifeline...will never call them again...i just tried the online chat counselling on here...says its open til 10pm...but unavailable...then it occurs to me...what could anyone possibly say that will make me feel better...nothing...there's nothing that can change how i feel...the love of my life would rather do nothing n watch me waste away than take 5 mins from his phone to listen to me...if i do manage to get his attention if i get emotional he says "are ya done?"...if i get angry he gets mad n storms out...if i try to explain what I'm goin thru he says "waa waa waa always the victim"...wtf could anyone possibly say that would make me NOT want to end this pain?

hi @Former-Member
I can hear that your pain is intense right now and you are feeling overwhelmed by things. Again, it is so important to reach out to supports if you are feeling unable to keep yourself safe. I will send you another email if you could check your inbox.
All the best

We're so sorry to hear that you are in so much pain @Former-Member and feel that you have no one to talk to. Please know that there are people that do care and we're trying to make sure that you are safe.