To hospital or not to hospital

Thanks so much @Snowie .It is good to b able to come on here and just let it all out. If only the care and support we receive on here cld somehow translate into feeling better and recovery from symptoms. That wld b great hey?

Thanks for thinking of me and showing ur support @Snowie . I hope u doing well. Xxx

@Doglover No need to apologize. Everyone helps each other on the forum. You are giving back with your kindness and empathy towards others. It is evident that you are a caring soul who is just in need of some help atm. We have all been there.xxxx

Xxxx Thank u @Bunniekins for ur kindness and understanding.

I do appreciate all the support shown me here. I just wish i wasnt going thru this torture and didnt feel so trapped with no way out!

hugs @Doglover no need to apologise. It sounds like you're maybe depressed? I totally get that, I struggle with depression (and anxiety) every day. Many times I don't feel up to supporting others & just need to look after myself and just want to be supported. I am by no means high functioning, I struggle with house cleaning, grocery shopping & cookery, the laundry.. every day. And for whatever reason I find hair-washing and tooth brushing/flossing the most horrendous ordeal that is a real struggle to do. I think you have a lot of strengths and are doing really well. I'm sorry you're suffering so badly from your symptoms right now.

Sitting with you and thinking of you today.

Hi @BryanaCamp ,

Im rly sorry u struggle so much with day to day activities, that must b tough. You certainly do a great job on the forums supporting other people.

I do think i am depressed now tho i think its as a result of my situation. My biggest stuggle is anxiety which is absolutely extreme at the moment and they dont seem to b able to do anything about it. I hav the most awful physical symptoms as described in previous post and when its rly bad, like it is now, i cant sleep and am so restless and extremely agitated, cant keep still, gotta b moving. Like when im trying to sleep i cant bcoz of the burning sensations, racing mind, restless and agitation. Its just torture. But as iv said, im scared of going into hospital bcoz i think its caused by physical things (food/chemical sensitivities) not mental, and as long as they keep giving me drugs with ingredients im sensitive to im just going to keep getting worse. But they all just think im mental and me thinking that is a part of the mental illness. But i hav a history of these sensitivities long before mi. In fact the diagnosis of mi came after an iron infusion bcoz i got all these symptoms straight after the infusion, which had hapnd many times previously. Thats why i feel so trapped. And im so scared if i go into hospital, im not going to get any better then how do i get out? And what if i get more and more agitated, as i hav bn, to the point that they put me in the locked ward. I am absolutely petrified @BryanaCamp . I cant keep living like this but the alternative (hospital) has the potential to make me worse for above reasons, so im trapped. I dont see any way out of this. I just dont know what to do.

Hi @Doglover - I am so sorry you are going through this right now.

It can be so frustrating to not be understood or feel heard when you are in hospital. Do you have a regular GP that you see that might be able to help you with this and working with the hospital around the sensitivies you mentioned? Or are there any other supports around you that could help advocate for you if you were in hospital?

Hi Lauz,

Thank u for ur post.

Unfortunately my gp left the clinic a cpl of months ago and the gp i hav transferred to has been on leave for the last cpl of months. Having said that, it wldnt matter anyway as neither of them are supportive of my beliefs. They think its all mental. My detailed history of these episodes being precipitated by the same specific things is a load of rubbish as far as their concerned. The only person is my husband who also doesnt believe me so thr wont be any help there. He doesnt want me going into hospital either bcoz he is scared of the outcome, but for different reasons. And if im right in what i believe, all the medicines hav the same excipients in them so anything they giv me is going to make me worse, just like it is now. I just dont see an answer to this @Former-Member .

That is very challenging and like so many here, it can be so hard to find the right supports. Have others had experiences in having to find a professional that they clikced with or trusted? Maybe we can all share some insights on this.

Sometimes it takes multiple trys to find the right person for you but it might be worth continuing to look for a good GP or counsellor- but I know thats way easier said than done. Glad you are connecting with support here

Thanks Lauz.

I am seeing my psychologist today and plan to talk to him about it but it is only my 2nd visit to him so we havnt developed that rapport yet. The unfortunate thing is, even with the right gp/counsellor/advocate, i still dont see a way out of this situation for the reasons previously mentioned, wont go over them all again. But just dont see a way out or thru this. Basically, to put it bluntly, i think im stuffed!

Hi @Doglover , sending some thoughts and well wishes to you. I really feel for you and the situation you find yourself in. I hope things go alright with the phsychologist and he has some positive suggestions for you. Be open and honest with him.

Try and be calm, concentrate on your breathing and try to consciously relax your mind and body. I usually find music puts me in a better place, at least for a time. You are very strong, enduring and being so resilient like you are.