Looking for advice

Hi @tyme

I would describe a proper friend as someone who is human, who I can meet and communicate with in person, who I don't have to pay for their time, who shares interests with me and wants to spend time with me away from the activity where I met them.

The people I most connect with are those who I have met in common interest activities, who are similar age and upbringing to me, who share longer term goals. I have met a few but they didn't want to continue communicating with me, so I am still searching.

Yesterday I was working from 8:15 am to 6:45 pm. When I finished I was exhausted. I am recovering today.

Hearing you @P12 ,

Seems to be a common theme amongst others too.

What I've noticed is that what friendships look like can vary across time. That is, as younger people, people connect a lot more. Then, just say, family come along, that period of time might mean the kids get together, but you do see people a lot less (purely due to circumstances). Then when children leave the nest, it's an opportunity for people to connect agin.

Of course this is a very 'typical' timeline... but I've observed it for a long time.

Where the disparity is, is when one is at a different life stage to another. That's what I feel. For me, I was 'slow' to progress. By the time people moved on in life, I was still at a standstill.... but now, only now, I am truly 'living', while others around me a slowing down...

There's not right or wrong. It's just an opportunity to reflect.

And as you mentioned, you work. When people are working they have less time to commit to things. Then if they work and have a family, they have even less time!

Bottom line, do what's right for you, and maybe find people who are at a similar stage (not age) in life to you?

Thoughts?

Also, enjoy your day relaxing!

Hi @tyme

I fear I simply don't know how to make friends. My social coach made a similar suggestion that statistically most people my age have already made friends and aren't able to have more and to look for people from all ages groups, but I think it hasn't quite worked because I am still trying.

@P12 ! What a downer in terms of the research your social coach shared!

If I got that research data, I'd do whatever it takes to prove them wrong!

Arghhhhh!

So, where to from here? What are you going to do as your next step to get to where you ideally want to be?

Hi @tyme

As far as I know I must continue trying until I can't anymore. It makes theoretical sense, though it is unfortunate that humans have a limited lifespan and might never achieve their goals.